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Am I wrong for being mad?

Am I wrong for being mad at DH for ignoring me when he plays video games? Or am I being petty? I have told him how I feel many times, and it's not like he plays them that much...but he is in lala land when he does & doesn't hear a word I say or help with our son during that time. I half way feel justified, and half way feel like a jerk!

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LovesFredric

Asked by LovesFredric at 12:20 PM on Jul. 31, 2009 in Relationships

Level 2 (12 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • My DH is the same way when he plays! I give him an hr or so to play without interruption and after that he knows its time to turn around and pay attention to the outside world! Perhaps you could come to some sort of similar arrangement, bc gamers DO get caught up in the games they play unfortunately and its not likely to change :( You have the right to be mad, but I stopped a long time ago- its a practice in futility lol!
    Emuu

    Answer by Emuu at 12:24 PM on Jul. 31, 2009

  • You are NEVER WRONG for feeling any way that you do. No matter what. If you FEEL angry, it's your right. And DH should take your feelings into consideration.
    TheDiva320

    Answer by TheDiva320 at 12:25 PM on Jul. 31, 2009

  • Its just that he's fully involved and actually doesn't know what's going on around him. People do this with different activites.

    I am like this when I am reading. Don't ask me anything because I won't hear you, or I will hear you kind of, but while in my mind its only taken me a few seconds to respond, its actually been an hour since you said anything. I am completely absorbed with the task at hand. I've done this since childhood. I would read, mom would call me for dinner, and by the time I "recognized" what she said, dinner was cold.

    So, if he doesn't play often, give him a break. I am not saying your wrong, just that everyone has a different thing they "zone" with. Art, Music, Reading, games. Its actually good for you, because your mind is completely relaxed in a sense. You can also work out other things while "zoned" that you hadn't realized you were even thinking about.
    Lesli

    Answer by Lesli at 12:45 PM on Jul. 31, 2009

  • i think ever dh plays some sorta of game it dont bother me any more when my husbands playing i just let him play i realized that he is under so much stress that he needs a relief and if playing games help him then thats okay with me its not like he plays them everyday 24/7 if he did than it would be a problem but if its an hour a day i dont care but i dont work and my husband does so he is constantly stressing about things and i know he means well so maybe its the same thing with yours
    newmom183

    Answer by newmom183 at 12:47 PM on Jul. 31, 2009

  • My Dh is the used to be the same way, so we set up a deal, he gets an hr of play time while the kids are awake. My DH used video games as an outlet, when he was frustrated or anxious. We also had the deal that he does not play violent games while kids are awake. Things like COD were saved for bed time. At which point he can play his little heart out as long as he says that is his intention, and then the following night we have movie night, just the two of us. However DH doesn't play much anymore at all, he got a new job and is gone ALOT. So when he's home he has family time. But those rules helped us and most likely saved our marriage.

    LadyLuck13

    Answer by LadyLuck13 at 12:53 PM on Jul. 31, 2009

  • Thanks for your responses, ladies! I have found myself thinking something that each of you have said. We both work, and I totally understand needing time to unwind and destress. Maybe part of my problem is I feel like I don't get that, so when he's playing I feel jealous of the fact that he gets a total break, while I am fussing over the house and caring for our toddler. Also, we have a smaller house, so when he's playing in the livingroom, the game kinda takes over the whole house. I should talk to him about setting up some ground rules that we can both be happy with though!
    LovesFredric

    Answer by LovesFredric at 12:58 PM on Jul. 31, 2009

  • My DH has "selective hearing" when it comes to certain things like TV, sports, gaming. Then again, I'm the same way sometimes.
    MOM2JEM

    Answer by MOM2JEM at 1:04 PM on Jul. 31, 2009

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