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Am I wrong for feeling this way everytime I see his ex?

Before my husband and I got married, he was in a very serious relationship with his ex girlfriend that lasted 3 years. They were in love and were planning on marriage until she left him heart broken. After that he met me and we were friends for about 3 years and now we've been married for 1 year and now im bechilded. He treats me like a queen, spoil, and care for me dearly. We get along great and are always happy together. The thing that still bothers me is that I still see his ex around when we go out to friend's house or anywhere. His ex is also part of our group of friends and i've also befriended her. I still feel uncomfortable seeing her and my husband still talks and play around with her like his other friends. He has an open relationship and doesn't hide anything from me, and also told me that he doesn't want anyone to feel left out and be equal. Should I be jealous?Why am I jealous?

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NTND

Asked by NTND at 5:16 PM on Aug. 2, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • i'd be jealous too
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:27 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • It is a natural reaction to feel uncomfortable. You just need to remember that she is the past and you are the presant and future. May be with time it will get easier to be around her. For now though you are getting the same uneasy feelings most people would, and handling better than over 80% of those people would.
    Alanaplus3

    Answer by Alanaplus3 at 5:27 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • your best shot would be to be friends with her. but yeah if my husbands ex were around i'd be INSANE with jealousy and hatred.
    staciandababy

    Answer by staciandababy at 5:28 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • If you really love and trust him and he has not given you a reason to not trust him you have to let this go. Jealousy is very unattractive to most men and will destroy a marriage very quickly. Be confident and realize he has moved on if he wanted to be with her he would be. He wants you and is with you. You are pregnant and probably feeling a little hormonal. I would talk to him about your feelings and then let it go.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:48 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • It would be hard for me too thinking that he still had feelings for her since she's the one who left. Keep in mind that he married you. That has to mean something so in the end you won his heart.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 5:51 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • It sounds like he really loves you, but I disagree about him treating her like all of his other friends. She's not. She's his ex-girlfriend, ex-fiance, ex-lover.......and if he wants to make it easier for you, and for the two of you to be friends, he can't treat her like just any other friend, that's not their history.
    ohwrite

    Answer by ohwrite at 6:47 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • jealousy is a horrible thing...it's something that can completely ruin a relationship......unfortunately i too, am one of the jealous types.....so i'd get jealous if i were u as well, not that either of us have anything to really worry about because ur husband obviously loves u very much....maybe if u tell him that it makes u uncomfortable he wont joke around and play around with u as much anymore....which i don't think he should be doing so much if he is an ex...
    fay101

    Answer by fay101 at 11:37 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • I think that its perfectly normal for you to feel the way that you do, if I were in your shoes I am sure that I would feel the same way. You said yourself that your husband adores you and treats you like a queen so I think that the best thing for you to do would be to explain to him that you trust him completely and you know that there are no longer feelings there, but you just can't help but feel jealous when he jokes and plays around with her. If he is the prince that you say he is then I bet he will make a lot more of an effort not to pay attention to her.
    AshleyBishop06

    Answer by AshleyBishop06 at 3:57 AM on Aug. 3, 2009

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