Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Is this an ok amount of time to have not sent a thank you, yet? Did I deserve this?

My dad sent me a b-day gift. I was in FL when it came. We've been home for less than 2 weeks. I've been cleaning and catching up. Didn't get the mail right away. I received a nasty email about how I am ungrateful and classless. Not from him mind you, but it was signed from my "sister" who I have only met twice and her mom! Prior to this correspondence I had not talked to either since before Christmas. I do agree a note should be sent, but I feel this was rather brutal and out of line on their part. There is lots more to the story, but you know.......not enough time or energy to write about it all. I will say I turned 38 for crying out loud!

Answer Question
 
Teachermom01

Asked by Teachermom01 at 5:58 PM on Aug. 2, 2009 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (20)
  • call
    staciandababy

    Answer by staciandababy at 5:59 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • haha call him and say thanks who sents thank u letters to their parents now a days.. and then tell them to shut up and mind their own business
    miss_nevin

    Answer by miss_nevin at 6:01 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • I'd send the thank you note then like the poster above I'd call dad and tell him what happened.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:01 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • Ignore them. Talk to your Dad and send a note. If he doesn't have a problem with it then no worries.
    Tawanda74

    Answer by Tawanda74 at 6:04 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • 2 weeks and they are doing that? As if. A month is good and a bit longer too since you were out of town.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:19 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • Well now you know for sure to be wary around them. A gift is something you give to a person because you want to give it, not in expectation of thanks. And it's also none of their business even if (not saying they did) they had picked out and sent it to you. It was supposed to be from your Dad. Talk about classless!
    LauraMi261

    Answer by LauraMi261 at 6:27 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • I agree that 2 weeks is not much time, although if it was my dad I probably would have called him within that time. I don't think your "sister" and her mom should have had anything to do with it, and believe me I understand that hurt. I personally think she showed a total lack of class to send such an e-mail, and put her nose in where it didn't belong. Don't let them hurt you. I don't know what your relationship has been with your dad. My parents divorced when I was 23, and I had 20 years of hurt after a childhood with the ideal dad. I feel your pain

    As for what the other poster said about a gift being something that you buy without an expectation of thanks......I think thanking people for remembering you shows appreciation and class....I also think when you make the effort to send someone a gift, it's nice to know that they received it. It's sad to feel that a gift doesn't require the smallest effort of thanking someone.
    ohwrite

    Answer by ohwrite at 6:43 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • My parents would not expect a thank you card for me. They would be upset if one of my siblings sent an email like that
    mommybug77

    Answer by mommybug77 at 6:45 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • I've been home from FL for 11 days........I did not know my dad until about 18 months ago. I did call him today and leave a message saying I was hurt by this. I also sent him a letter right before my trip and asked for some space and shared with him some things about how I grew up, which were pretty bad. I am thinking of sending the earrings and the gift from the previous year back. Also, the same "Snoopy" card came with the gift, the exact same one he gave me last year. I tried to reach out the his daughter and wife, but they seemed to not want that so I've left them alone. The daughter also posted on Facebook that "she was disgusted by people who don't say thank you for gifts." This is a totally new relationship and new uncharted waters. I did respond to her email and FB in a productive way, but I'm still hurt and really ticked off. This should be between my dad and I---not them ganging up on me.

    Teachermom01

    Answer by Teachermom01 at 6:51 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • You can do whatever you like with the gifts but please do not send them back. I don't think you would, you just feel hurt by their actions. You let your Dad know in a message and it was a good idea to speak up immediately.
    LauraMi261

    Answer by LauraMi261 at 6:59 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN