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my 12 year old has her menstrual cycle and will not talk about it to anyone

she is putting dirty pads in her draws and will throw out her underwear if they get dirty and not tell anyone I have told her what to do with the dirty pads but she just dont do it.. She will never undress or dress in front of me and I am her mom. Is anyone else going through this Should I take her to talk with a professional??? Please help

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Asked by georgeanns at 9:06 PM on Aug. 2, 2009 in Tweens (9-12)

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Answers (15)
  • Take her to the doctor to discuss it.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:07 PM on Aug. 2, 2009


    Answer by piwife at 9:12 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • shes not mad shes embarrassed and doesn't want anyone to know so she hides them. Sit her down and explain its ok and every woman gets one its just part of gettin older. take her out to eat or something special she likes to do.

    Answer by chrstny88 at 9:17 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • Sounds like she's just uncomfortable (for whatever reason) with talking to you about it & maybe a little embarrassed, too.

    Does she have a "cool aunt", older cousin, etc that might make it easier for her?

    Answer by Laura1229 at 9:17 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • i remember my mom got me a book that explain everything to me. it was good but . well maybe she can talk to a cool family member.

    Answer by piwife at 9:21 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • someone other than her mom needs to talk about it.

    you'll probably just make it worse

    Answer by charisma10 at 9:30 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • She is embarrassed about it.. I started my period at 9 years old and was the same way until I was 18 years old (even after I had my son..) I wouldn't go as far as hiding my pads in drawers and stuff but I would wrap them up in a bunch of toilet paper and then throw them away in the main garbage so noone saw them in the trashcan. Also if I messed up underwear i'd throw them out. Once I started doing my own laundry and stuff it wasn't so bad but it can be an embarrassing thing (even if it is perfectly normal). Still to this day I have a 4 year old child and am 21 years old and when I go to buy pads i'll throw them underneath other stuff.

    Answer by KalebsMommee at 10:11 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • She needs someone to talk to her and soon. That is not a good thing that she is hiding pads in her drawers, that's a breeding ground for bacteria to grow. YUCK!!! Have an aunt or older cousin or friend talk to her. She is probably just uncomfortable. You can also have a nurse or doctor talk to her too.

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 11:25 PM on Aug. 2, 2009

  • I wouldn't expect her to undress in front of you ever ever again. As for hiding used pads. explain to her that it is a cleaniness issue ad that you will not tolerate it. Ask her if she would like her own trash can or put her in charge of taking out all the household trash everyday, so she doesn't have to worry that anybody else will "see the evidence" and know her business. As far as the underware, that is a hard one. Now that I have teenage sons, I have to be careful about rinsing out anything and where I hang it to dry. She needs to somehow be in charge of her own clean up without anybody else being made aware that it is her time of the month again.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:52 AM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • Mine is somewhat doing this. She told me when it happened, but when I ask her are you still she gets extremely upset and snippy. I had a really good heart to heart with her and it seemed to help some. She made me promise not to tell her daddy so I have had to keep it from him but he'll figure it out soon. She has not dressed in front of me for around a year now. I dont want to push that subject if she is timid about being nude in front of someone then that is a great thing for as long as it lasts. I think in time it will all work out but Im not sure of the hiding pads.

    Answer by scrappermom2 at 11:03 AM on Aug. 3, 2009

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