Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

I don't think he loves me anymore

My bf & I have been together for about 2 yrs & have a child (1 yr old). We dont get along. It seems like the only time we don't fuss or fight is when we just dont talk to each other which is quite too frequently if you ask me. I want to be with him & make it better but it seems no matter how we try, its never going to be ok. I told him I would get an apt & move out by the end of this month & he said "ok" like he didnt care one bit. I always thought if a man loved a woman, he would do whatever he needed to do to make sure his family stays together. After all, when i leave i'll be taking HIS daughter too. It hurts when I think about leaving & its scary. I tried leaving before but he talked me out of it by agreeing to counseling which we've been doing for the past 2 months but I am not seeing any improvement. Im so depressed about this, i just want to be happy- is that too much? Someone please just give me your honest opinion.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 10:20 AM on Aug. 3, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (9)
  • keep going to counseling.bring up these issues with the councelor

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:27 AM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • you had a baby too soon. Can't change that now but I bet he just wanted to have more fun with you before he became a dad.
    You may need time apart and do not go back till you get married. He needs time to choose he may feel like he is being forced.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:33 AM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • aww im not good at advise but .. i feel the same way with my hubby ... i really wouldnt know what to do in your situation .. it sound like maybe you should be done with him ... im starting to think that i want to be done with mine ... im financially stuck to him .. i didnt graduate h.s. soo im screwed .. im scared to leave him ... not only cause idk what would happen in the future for the baby .. and financially ... im stuck too .. im pretty much in the same situation ... your not alone in this ...idk what to say to help just keep trying thats what im doing .. im waiting till it gets to the point where i cant take it anymore ... but idk ... i hope everything will workout for you .. good luck

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:38 AM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • sorry but it sounds like he wasn't ready to have a family. maybe in time he'll settle down and come back

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:12 AM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • My husband and I seperated twice. When we seperated we were boyfriend and girlfriend.He is my best friend in the whole world and we have a great relationship.Maybe you need time apart.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:19 AM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • Since you are so unhappy and your boyfriend doesn't sound happy either, keep on with your plans to leave. If you don't have a job you should get one, and you'll want to arrange for child support. It may be that a different counselor would help.

    Answer by Bmat at 11:21 AM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • ((OP))

    Well, I have a job so thats not an issue. The issue is LEAVING. A part of me wants to stay but a bigger part knows its probably best to be apart. It hurts like hell just thinking about leaving. I know he's not happy, tells me all the time that he's tired of being together, tired of all the bs. But yet he keeps going to counseling? I feel tired of trying to make it work too, but I keep trying to hold on. We hardly ever talk & when we do its fussing at each other. How do you try to work things out when there's so much resentment & anger in the way? There's so much turmoil on both of our parts it just seems so hopeless.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:16 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • u cant be the only one putting the work in the relationship it takes 2. i felt the same way when i kicked m,y ex out of r house...i was tired of the drinking, hitting and no effection except when he wanted sex. i wanted to be with my dd dad so bad so she could have a biological familyto grow up in and i wanted to have the same last name that she had..stupid i know but i had to put her happieness first and that meant leaving her dad...fortuantly my best friend turned out to be the man of my dreams and we got married a few months later...i dont recomand u take the approch i did for some it work for others it dont i got extreamly luck with my hubby...get out on ur own surround urself with friends and family and make a life for u and ur dd if u and ur bf deside to work it out live seperalty for a while give him time to grow up but not to much time b/c u shouldnt have to put ur life on hold for him

    Answer by rainmommy at 1:36 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • The only way you can be happy is to make yourself happy. Sounds as if he's not willing to put forth good efforts to save the relationship, therefore, you can't make him. Life is a learning take what you've learned from this relationship and move on...

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 1:57 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in Relationships
Get A Movin'

Next question overall (Pregnancy)
How can I get rid of hip pain?