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My 7 yo step daughter is being abused and CPS wont help...

...because its not physical abuse so we cant prove it. I know for a fact her mother mentally and emotianolly abuses her. I have seen it first hand. We are in the midle of a custody battle and I could just get CPS to make the case she would be ours. The have tried to do counceling for her but around her if your are on state medical if they see you ones and you act fine they say your fine. They dont take the time to see her in a bad faze. Also she has trust issues from all of this so she wont tell the counceler everything and they wont allow me or her dad in there with her and we are the only ones who can get her to talk. How can CPS not care?! I dont get it! Isnt it there job?! Has anyone had a similer experience? What did you do?


Asked by belljaz at 12:32 PM on Aug. 3, 2009 in General Parenting

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Answers (7)
  • Does she act "different" after being with the other bio parent? We have a case worker we work with and she just said to document everything that happens. Things she says and does etc. and to try to have others around when the child comes to you as witnessess to the behavior or things she says. I can sympathize with you. We had some wack pot case workers before we finally found a good one. Most just acted like we were being vindictive when we truly believed there was a problem. If you need to talk about it pm me. Ive been thru it alllll with my sd and dhs ex wife. Its sad what some people will do to their children over a parental grudge kwim?

    Answer by Goldie_And_Luke at 12:58 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • She acts way diffrent. She is actually happy when we have her but when it is time for her to go back with mom she cries and begs us to keep her. We have had witnesses but they still arnt doing anything. Thats pretty much what they are doing with us acting like we are vindictive and just trying to make things hard on her but thats bull. If I didnt have a good reason I wouldnt try to get a child away from there mother.

    Answer by belljaz at 1:03 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • Its tough! I feel for you tho. Its especially hard because they arent "our" children. Sometimes a judge doesnt need cps to intervene. Just have the lawyer subpeona your witnessess to testify to the sd behaviour. Who has physical custody now?

    Answer by Goldie_And_Luke at 1:12 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • her mother but we are SUPPOSED to get her over the summer which hasnt happened.

    Answer by belljaz at 1:14 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • Was it ordered from a judge? That might help in court. I would get references from any teachers or ANYONE that knows you and dhs parenting. If you have a church get the pastor, minister, priest etc. to write recomendation letters. Try to seek private therapy if you can.

    Answer by Goldie_And_Luke at 1:19 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • Sadly no it wasnt. They desided between the 2 of them what was going to happen but he trusted she would stick to it. Should we get everyone who knows us and our parenting to put it in writing?

    Answer by belljaz at 1:22 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • The counselor should be asking you or her father what is gon gon and then meeting with her and building trust and a relationship with her so she will open up. Go to an independant person see if they take state medical. Do you have another kind of insurance on top of that? that might help. Also tell the new counselor what you said on here. I cant believe they are not talking to you or the dad!! What about if you and the dad went to counseling and then talked about your problems going on withthe daughter and then brought her in? that would give you a diferent way to go about it.

    Answer by stickyfingers at 3:34 PM on Aug. 3, 2009