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I'm in love with someone who isn't my husband.

What do I do about it? I feel like this man understands me better, treats me better, is more sensative and caring. So what do I do about this? I haven't cheated on my husband with him as far as physically just in my thoughts and my emotions.

Anyone ever been in this situation?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:51 PM on Aug. 3, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (24)
  • Grass is always greenest over the septic tank.


    Answer by Anonymous at 8:52 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • been there done that. Want to know the truth? Half the time that way they treat you changes. if you dont want to be with your husband then leave him, but dont let this guy be the reason. You'll regret it. You may think I dont know 'your situation' but believe me...this happened to me, my best friend and another friend of mine. We are all have been through it and we all luckily decided to stay where we were....we all almost screwed up our marriages (we werent in it together,,,,just went through the same thing). and ruined our kids lives.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:54 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • I was writing to someone in prison, who I thought understood me better, we had better conversations, you know all that good stuff. And I know it is different because we couldnt se each other physically but its kind of the same because you said you hadnt cheated physically. Well I told him that I wanted to step back from a serious relationship right after I cut things off with my SO of 3 years and the father of my child. I told him I wanted to become better friends and see where we could take things from there. He wrote me back and told me he had been talking to someone else for a little while now. Even though I am happy with my decision to cut things off with my daughters father, it just shows how quickly things can change and YOU might not be happy with YOUR decision.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:58 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • That's exactly what happened to my fiancé's ex-wife. My fiance never even saw it coming even though the ex was "falling in love" with this man for several years - he was a close friend of the family. They are still together and it is 3 years later. They live together and most likely will not get married any time soon so they don't lose the hefty spousal support they get from my fiance. doesn't always end badly when you fall in love with someone not your husband. But it never happens if you are happy at home. You obviously are not in love with your hubby or something is seriously missing in your marriage for this to happen.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:02 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • Your going down a road of a lot of regret and heart break. Don't do this to your family. If you and your hubby are having problems then fix them and if there not fixable then leave your hubby not for another man but for you. Your children and your family need you not the bull shit that you want to start you will get your heart broken by this guy and why do you want to break your childrens hearts and your hubbys heart for you just to get your broken.??

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:03 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • I have to agree that he seems great now but then again so did your husband when you married him. Maybe you should tell hubby what you want from him again and see if he'll step up to the plate so this guy won't seem so perfect.

    Answer by admckenzie at 9:03 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • Something is missing in my relationship with my husband. I don't feel he and I connect on a personal level. We're from two seperate worlds. We collide on alot of issues. He doesn't get along well with my parents and we butt heads with how we each raise our daughter.

    I don't want this man to be the reason I leave my husband. I know nothing good can come out of that. And if I do end up with this other man I want it to be on good terms. I just know deep in my heart that things between my husband and I are on thin ice and it's only a matter of time before we both realize that this isn't working.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:05 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • i felt that.. and i did leave for the guy and when i lost my home the guy wouldnt let me move in with him! i got BURNED.. and thankfully my hubby took me back and that was 7 years ago now

    Answer by hottietottie455 at 9:06 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • Not a good thing. How does he feel about you?

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:09 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

  • It sounds like your marriage is ending. Maybe meeting this guy is just what tilted it in the direction of happening sooner. But no matter what your reasons for leaving, your husband will construe it that this guy is the reason - not him or the marriage. Also, be prepared that he will say some things to your child that paint you as a family-deserter. That YOU left them - abandoned them. Be prepared for a very painful road no matter what your reasons for leaving. Even if you never see this other man again. Ending your marriage will bring plenty of heartache to your child.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:11 PM on Aug. 3, 2009

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