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i swear ill never find the right man.

im 21 with two kids and SINGLE. as young as my kids are they dont understand dating. i dont want guys in and out of their life. So i try to date ppl and from the start i tell them i want something long term and to try to work problems out so that it will last.I have found only one man i thought was on the same page as me. my daugter started calling him daddy (on her own) and now hes GONE. he decided he wasnt ready to date anyone and only wanted to sleep around with people. anyway my question is how would someone go about finding someone that has the samething idea of a realtionship? How did you find the man ur with now?


Asked by Anonymous at 2:57 PM on Aug. 4, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • First of all - DON'T sleep with them until you know that he is looking for a long term relationship. Men will say all kinds of things they think you want to hear in order to get you in bed. And a lot of times they actually believe what they are saying at the time. So the best thing to do is wait a long time before you become intimate. This will weed out the guys who are sleeping around or who don't know what they want. Be patient. It takes the right person at the right time. The best thing you can do is be a good mom and take care of yourself and your children first. Find your own happiness. Don't look for it in a man.

    Answer by kathyartist2007 at 3:01 PM on Aug. 4, 2009

  • :( I found my man on myspace, but I definitely wouldn't recommend that! He's definitely an exception.

    Answer by staciandababy at 2:58 PM on Aug. 4, 2009

  • I would start taking my babies to church every Sunday, and I would find a church that had a singles department. That's the best place on earth to find men who are looking for wives instead of what the most of them are looking for. You will also meet other young women there who are looking for the same kind of relationship that you are looking for and so you won't feel so alone all the time. You will be able to be with people who can encourage you and whom you can encourage to stand firm and wait for the right choice for all of you. And, let the men do the pursuing. That's one good rule that has all but been thrown out in the last several years. The guy who really wants a wife will be looking for wifely material. So, all you have to do is concentrate on being the best wife material around. It's amazing how well this technique works, and they say it's outdated. I don't think so! I will soon have been married 45 years.

    Answer by NannyB. at 3:04 PM on Aug. 4, 2009


    Answer by Anonymous at 3:05 PM on Aug. 4, 2009

  • Your young, the right man will come along someday. Your main concern in your life should be your children, not finding a man!

    Answer by mommy2karsyn at 3:05 PM on Aug. 4, 2009

  • hhaahaha I found my man on myspace thru my colleges page, he's an exception too. that can end up a tragedy.

    Answer by Dom123123 at 3:08 PM on Aug. 4, 2009


    PLEASE oh PLEASE get the book by Steve Harvey called Act Like A Lady, Think Like A Man. I've been reading it & oh my goodness I can't tell you all the insight it's given me. Everything you're wanting to know is in that book.. im sooo serious you need to get on it!!

    Answer by Lextacy at 3:15 PM on Aug. 4, 2009

  • I met mine online on yahoo. If I had small kids I'd hang at parks and sports areas. Single dads usually go watch their kids play. That means they are ok with kids and usually want a relationship not a fling. Go to any community functions that are for kids. It's a great place to meet single dads.

    Answer by admckenzie at 4:07 PM on Aug. 4, 2009

  • Being alone really sucks sometimes and it leaves you feeling lonely. You have kids though and when you chose to have kids you made the choice to forget your personaly "extra" needs for that of doing what is right by your kids. Never settle. You can't BECAUSE of the kids. Date occasionaly but never at your house with the kids. They should NEVER meet anyone you are dating untill you have been proposed to. Your child should NEVER been allowed to call the last boyfriend "daddy" under any circumstances except marriage. There is someone out there for you but: 1) you are young with a lot of responsibility- it will take awhile 2) children from previous relationships is hard for even the best person to adjust to and 3) a man actually sounds like the last thing you need for a few more years- untill the kids are somewhat older.

    Answer by Traxx at 4:24 PM on Aug. 4, 2009

  • I am sorry this is not going to help but when you know the answer to that let me know. i am going though the same thing!!!!

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:59 AM on Aug. 5, 2009