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Okay here is something I don't understand?

I was with my bf for a year and a half, now I'm 25 weeks pregnant with his first child, a son, and he leaves me saying he wanted a girl so he won't help me raise our son, he will pay child support and that's it? I really don't get it, I'm lost and confused! What can I do?


Asked by Anonymous at 2:01 AM on Aug. 5, 2009 in Pregnancy

This question is closed.
Answers (20)
  • Does he have son already nd wants a girl? Or it is possible he was abused sexually by a male?

    I have a male friend who was sexually abused by his uncle as a child add he is DEATHLY afraid of having a boy bc he feels he's messed up and can't care for a son like he could a daughter. ??

    I don't know though honey... I wish you the best of luck and hope that you can work things out. ((hugs))

    Answer by NDFanatik at 2:07 AM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • sorry to tell ya but you forget about him and move on.. men sometimes.. nothing u can do about it.. ur child is the most important thing... boy or girl.. so forget about him and worry about the baby

    Answer by miss_nevin at 2:04 AM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • Tell him that it's his fault the baby is a boy since he decides the baby's gender and then let him go.
    If he's really going to leave you over that, he doesn't sound worth it and I'm sure you can find better.
    Good luck

    Answer by Marix3 at 2:05 AM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • I guess I just don't understand... I mean I know he wanted a girl ever since I told him I was pregnant and we always called it a she, but then when we found out it was a boy I didn't mind but he apparantly did! I just don't get why it matters, are girls really that desirable?

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:08 AM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • move on. if he's not willing to be a father just b/c its a boy, thats a load of crap, you and your son deserve better. take his money for child support but don't try to get him to stay in the relationship, he seems like a waste of time to me.

    Answer by vabchmommy at 2:08 AM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • Duh just noticed you said it was his 1st... sorry. NVM the 1st part of my response, lol.

    Answer by NDFanatik at 2:09 AM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • ND I don't know that makes sense but if it has happened he's never said! Should I talk to his parents? I mean I can understand if he just didn't want to be a parent at all but why just not want to be a parent to a boy?

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:10 AM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • You know ND that makes perfect sense now that I think about it! I will talk to him about it if I can ever get him alone.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:13 AM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • Dude, if he was sexually abused I would stay way far away from him. ALL child sex offenders say that they do it because it happened to them. Don't take my word for it, do a little research. I don't want to say it, but it's possible that he wants to leave his son so that his son can grow up right, and that he was hoping for a girl so that he could abuse her. Have you ever heard of that boys and mens sick group of pedophiles who claim that children like it?
    Don't walk, RUN, and feel thankful that your not going to be with him!

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:19 AM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • Most MEN never talk about sexual abuse... It's not as accepted for men to be abused as it is for women unfortunately. They are less likely to tell anyone bc of the social stigma placed on them. I only know about my friend bc he had a breakdown after my son was born and I asked him why he would never touch him. :(

    That being said, it may not be the issue. Have you 2 had any personal issues? is there a chance he is having an affair? May seem strange, but men will make the most idiotic excuses when cheating in order to get their "freedom" from someone they feel tied down to (like a pregnant gf). No offense to you or anything.. so please don't take it that way. Just brainstorming.

    I can't imagine going through this though. :(

    Answer by NDFanatik at 2:19 AM on Aug. 5, 2009