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stuck between two men that i love...

my daughter's father left me back in January. Our relationship has been veru rocky from the very begining. we're young, 22. i was completely heart broken and finally moved on. somehow by fate or Coincidence i met this guy. he's 29 has his whole life lined out and everything. he's everything i've wanted my ex to be. ok so him and i hit it off perfectly, i couldnt be more happy and content with my life..... UNTIL fathers day when my daughter's father came back and confessed all of his love (which he has never done before so its not fake or foney) to me and completely threw me off track with the man i was dating..........ok so i cant make up my mind, i feel as if i dont get back with my daughters dad im giving up on my family, even though he did 6 mo ago. and if i give up the guy thats been everything i wish my ex was, i know i will regret it bc i will be wishing my daughter's father was him or did the things he did.

advice?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 11:26 AM on Aug. 5, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • YOur DD's father left you guys. You have the right to be happy. Stay with the new man. Sounds like your DD's Dad is a no good butthole anyway
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:29 AM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • Listen ti what your exhas to say, take it all into consideration and then makea decision. Make sure you tell your ex that you are unsure and don't drag it out it makes it worse.
    my2loves0607

    Answer by my2loves0607 at 11:29 AM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • i know the answer is right there in front of my, go the the guy thats everything i want. but its not that simple, i love my daughters father very much. him and i grew up together and i've gave him so much of me in the last 3 years...he's ready to make things work and knows that a relationship need and that he was completely in the wrong...

    ugh! im a mess and i cant choose! its awful
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:30 AM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • Yes he wasin the wrong but if you still love him you can give him another chance. Peope make mestakes and they need to be forgivin. But if he ever pulls the stunt again u need to not take him back.
    my2loves0607

    Answer by my2loves0607 at 11:33 AM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • In my opinion , any man who would leave their daughter and significant other for 6 months , and then return to "confess his love " , is full of crap . He doesn't know what he wants , or what will make him happy . I think he's only using you to fill a void in his own life . And once that void is filled somewhere else , he will leave again .
    NaterbugsMommy

    Answer by NaterbugsMommy at 11:35 AM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • maybe take a break from both and think it over. not sure ex in such a short time could do a complete turnaround. the new guy came in because of fate so fast. be careful with both. how did your ex treat you before problems began, is it only in words he's changed? how has his life practices become better and lasting? does he do drugs or drink? how did he treat baby?

    how does your new guy treat baby, you? great cause new relationship? does he have exe's, how's he with them any other kids?

    lots to think about. take your time. honoring your baby in a stable nurturing environment is most important of all. that's far more important than having a partner so fast returning to an ex or a new guy.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:52 AM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • There's not a right answer. You need to do what you feel in your 'gut' is right. None of us here know your relationship with the father of your girl....only you do.

    This is the father of your child. It would be in the best interest of your daughter that you are married to her father and that you two grow and mature together. The only reason the new boyfriend has his act together is that he's 29, he's had the time to mature and develop into everything you're looking for. Your daughter's father may grow and mature into the same type of man if you're willing to give him time.

    What you need to figure out is his intent. Does he intend to stick around this time? Is he thinking long term? Is he ready to be a father to his child, and your wing man? Have a serious sit down with him and then decide what you want to do.

    If you have ANY doubt, I mean ANY doubt, then stay with your new boyfriend. He sounds like a winner!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:56 AM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • ex says he loves you after he left
    my boyfriend comfessed his love when i found him on dating site, this was the only time he really said he loves me
    it was heartbreaking that he chose this time to tell me that he loves me
    made the whole thing worse
    if he does not love you when he is with you and only loves you when you are not
    then he does not love you
    stay with the new one
    he sounds like a keeper
    (wish i had a keeper, that was wonderful to me and loved me when i was with him)

    but it is your choice, follow your heart
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:38 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • My Dear, you need to pray for wisdom and understanding! It'll really suck if you left guy #2 for guy#1 and in the long run he continues to be an ASS____! does he know about this new guy?and if yes ,IS he doing this "CHANGE" just from pure evil jealousy? or do you see sincerity in all,put him to the test , either PRETEND you want NOTHING to do with him OR,tell him you want to get marry ,a house for you and the baby, and see if he is willing to make up for all those months he left you GOOD LK!

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:58 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • Ex's do that. If you get back with him, it's extremely likely he will go back to his previous behavior and dump you and the baby again. Your new guy is "everything" you wanted, why risk it? Tell you ex to kiss-off. If he really, truly loved and cared for you, he wouldn't have abandoned you and your child.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:21 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

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