Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Am I crazy for not wanting to let my mother in law watch my baby?

My mother in law is bipolar and uses this as a guilt trip on my husband any chance she can. I get an awful feeling I cant explain when she is even near my baby. She has done multiple things to disrespect me such as ask my husband is he happy and when is he moving back in. I have seen her in her bipolar states multiple times over the last 3 years. She does not take her medications like she should and is very casual about it like it is no big deal.I have also heard multiple things that she has done when my husband was a baby (like lock him in his crib with a piece of wood) and leave him with others while she went out and did drugs (which she is actually clean not). And the fact she has been in a mental hospital for months at at time 4 times. It also does not help that Iam a nurse and have seen the multiple sides of bipolar in action. I just dont trust her and want to know if Iam crazy or if its worth sticking to my guns about.

Answer Question

Asked by kjess8713 at 2:39 PM on Aug. 5, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (35)

    This has to be a joke.

    Answer by timelessglass at 2:43 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • Since you're a nurse you know the answer. Why don't you trust your own instincts with your own medical skills? No matter how often she demands what ever of you, especially to babysit lo. Firmly say no because you are clearly not on your meds. Let me go to doctor with you for your visits and checkups and then we'll talk. Then end conversation, walk away hang up phone.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:43 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • My sister is bi-polar and an excellent single mom who I trust with my kids. But she's very vigilant about taking her meds and is very responsible. Your mil sounds like quite a piece of work and from what you've said I wouldn't trust her with my kids either. Stick to your guns, really it's about safety and your child's safety has to come first before her hurt feelings or any guilt trips she may try on you.

    Answer by canadianmom1974 at 2:43 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • I think you're justified in being apprehensive about letting her watch your baby.

    I have a hard enough time trusting people WITHOUT a mental illness.

    If she was stable and taking her medications properly then I wouldn't be as worried but the way you've described her, I wouldn't leave my baby alone with her.

    Answer by Laila-May at 2:44 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • IMO you should trust your instinct...

    Answer by momma_marian at 2:46 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • i agree with canadianmom. If she was good about taking her meds, then yeah. But the way you describe her, I wouldnt let my child be watched by her either. Just "stick to your guns" about your descision.

    Answer by MommyLee08 at 2:46 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • No I think you are right, if you cant trust her, dont let her babysit.

    Answer by midnightmoma at 2:48 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • NO FREAKING WAY i would let the woman watch my kid. it would make me nervous to even have her near him in my presence. no way, no way. stick to your instinct on this one... better safe than sorry; you never know what can happen.

    Answer by annelebar at 2:52 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • I understand your feelings. I hate my FIL and dispise the fact hat I have to let him touch my child. But hubby gets all pissy about it and goes on about how it's his dad. blah blah. I don't care, once a bastard always one. If you don't trust her, don't let her keep the child alone, but you may have to suck it up and let her hold the baby *supervised* of course. And lay down some ground rules such as taking meds and not being allowed around during an episode.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:57 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • you are 100% right to stick to your guns, girl! it might cause family friction, but in the end, your baby will be safe. and thats what matters most!
    i am in the same situation (EXACTLY the same. lol.). if you ever need to rant, just message me! i hope your husband supports you in this. i thank god that my fiance is behind me in all my decisions.

    Answer by mama_moonsong at 2:57 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.