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What Do You Mean When You Say "Homosexuality Is a Choice?"

When you say "homosexuality is a choice" do you mean that they have the same heterosexual preferences like everyone else but force themselves to be in homosexual relationships "just because?" I just can't imagine someone would want to be in a lifestyle that gets so many of them treated and spoken about so poorly. Why would someone choose that?


Do you acknowledge that they have a lack of attraction for the opposite sex and an attraction to the same sex but the "choice" part is the fact that they give in to their urges? If so, why do you think they have these urges to begin with?

I ask because I see a lot of people who aren't gay stating it's a choice and I'm not gay so I personally don't even pretend I know the heart or mind of another person. What makes people who aren't gay so sure it's a choice and what does that mean?

PLEASE no bashing. If you can't be an adult and answer seriously then pass.


Asked by NovemberLove at 3:30 PM on Aug. 5, 2009 in Religion & Beliefs

Level 13 (976 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (253)
  • I don't think we can control who we are attracted to period. The other day I went to the dentist and he walked in and I started blushing in embarassment. He was very good looking. I didn't WANT to be attracted to him, I am happily married, but I couldn't help it. I did have to choose how I was going to respond to that attraction.

    I think even heterosexuals can understand this idea. How many girls WANT to marry a Christian man, but they end up entangled with a man who does not believe or walk in Christ. The Bible teaches not to be unequally yoked, but we can't help who we are attracted to.

    I think we DO have a choice if we are going to follow Christ though. Some Christians do not believe homosexuality is a sin. I personally believe the Bible teaches that it is, but I don't think the Bible says homosexuals go to hell. Anyone who recieves Christ as savior can go to heaven, and the Holy Spirit will lead you in holiness.

    Answer by Cinnamon-mom at 3:54 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • And this has nothing to do with whether or not it is an sin or an abomination or whatever else so please don't go there. This question is about thinking, feeling and speaking for other people when you haven't walked in their shoes.

    Answer by NovemberLove at 3:31 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • homosexuality is a choice, because they CHOOSE to lead happy lives!

    Answer by bi-polarmommy at 3:44 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • When I say it is a choice, they have the choice to be who they want to be. We all have choices in this life. We can choose to steal or not steal, lie or not lie, live or not live. However each choice we make will determine the consequences thereof. If it is a good choice.. then good results, if not a good choice then bad results. Some choices may look good but in the long run are not so. Sometimes things are not what they seem. It is then we become deceived. Which is why when I make choices I check it with God. I have a huge choice to make in my life right now and the results either way are not the best but nevertheless I have to make a choice and it will affect the rest of my life! Wisdom says consult God and a couple of MATURE, God loving and fearing Christians IN my church. :-) I have to make the right choice :-) As for why homosexuality is a choice , both options you put up are true.

    Answer by Shaneagle777 at 3:53 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • I mean both are reasons why.

    Answer by Shaneagle777 at 3:54 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • lol bi-polar, I can see where you're coming from. I was more or less asking why people think that people choose to be homosexual to begin with, not why they choose to go with their feelings in order to feel happy :-)

    Answer by NovemberLove at 3:54 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • I don't know if that made sense. I think it is up to the person to decide what they want to do. And I have had my own struggles with sin, and I believe that this is something that cannot be changed except through a miracle of God. And that non-Christians should not be made to feel like they need to try and be straight. Because being straight does not make you automatically right with God, faith in Christ does.

    I don't know if I am making sense. I am eating right now so I am typing between bites. sorry. If you have any questions, I am open to them.


    Answer by Cinnamon-mom at 3:58 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • Ok, so I have some perspectives so far that have helped me understand a little bit better.

    Trying to empathize, I think of my attraction towards my husband and my lack of attraction towards women and I can't imagine waking up one day and saying "I think I'll like women now" and forcing myself to do it "just because I decided to." I think homosexuals REALLY do have attractions to the same gender and many lack of attraction to the opposite gender. So if that's the case, what do you suggest that they do instead? My one friend who says that they should get married and force themselves into a heterosexual relationship and be thankful that even though they're not happy, at least they're not sinning. I think that's a really mean thing to suggest to another person.

    Answer by NovemberLove at 3:59 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • lol. I do understand what you're trying to say Cin.

    Answer by NovemberLove at 4:00 PM on Aug. 5, 2009

  • personally I think there is probably more than one cause...this is why you DO find some homosexuals saying that they "got over it". I think the majority of homosexuals are that way genetically and will not be happy in a heterosexual relationship no matter how much you ridicule them. Some may also be bi and not realize it for whatever reason, and then think they have been "cured" when they find someone of the opposite sex that they ARE attracted to. 3rd, I think SOMETIMES it can be caused by outside influence...for example: fetishes are caused by outside influence...fetishes are usually memorable things that someone (usually guys) sees or experiences when they're going through puberty and then they become fixated on it. This could very well manifest itself as a fetish for the same sex...even though the person was not born that way. NONE of these, however, involve consciously CHOOSING to be that way.

    Answer by metalcowgirl34 at 4:02 PM on Aug. 5, 2009