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Tantrum Toddler Terror at night... please affirm it's a phase... right??

The last 2-3 weeks after I pick my kids up, my 20 month old son is just inconsolable. He's happy when I pick him up but the second I get him out of his seat, it's just downhill for a good 90 minutes. He won't eat because he's upset. I have no idea what's upsetting him.

My thoughts are he is 1) letting go because I'm safe 2) tired and letting go .

But he hits and bangs his head and throws things. And I'm so good... I"m not yelling at him. I just let him know I'm here and I make sure he can see me. But I figure it's a phase.... After a while, I just take him in his room and lay down with him until he calms down and I put him to bed with kisses.

Someone tell me, reinforce with me... it's a phase right??

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:25 AM on Aug. 6, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

Answers (3)
  • It better be a phase! If he's still doing this in ten years you're gonna have a big problem.
    Yes it's a phase, it sounds like you're handling it very well. If these behaviors are attention getting behaviors it's best to ignore them. So when he starts hitting himself stay out of his sight, then there'll be no reason for him to put on a show (of course still watch him, just don't let him know).

    Good luck.

    Answer by jellyphish at 1:50 AM on Aug. 6, 2009

  • It will be a phase that will last for the next 18 years if you don't take control of the situation now. He is at the age where he is determined to set his own boundaries and to have his own way. He will figure out exactly how to have it his way for as long as you allow him to. He needs to be disciplined. Discipline is teaching desired behavior. Is this the behavior that you desire to see demonstrated in him? If it's not, it is up to you to train him to behave in a manner that is acceptable to you. He has no other way of learning that and he will not simply grow into behaving that way. So you hold the keys in your hands, literally.

    Answer by NannyB. at 10:58 AM on Aug. 6, 2009

  • It's a phase. My daughter did the same thing. I found that if I gave her a snack to eat on the way home from day care, she was much more pleasant once I got home, but still clingy and whiney.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:36 AM on Aug. 6, 2009

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