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How do YOU filter out negative self-talk and negative talk from others?

Is this something that comes with age and practice, or are some people just born with it?

I just can't get a good grip on filtering out negative people.

Answer Question
 
caitxrawks

Asked by caitxrawks at 9:48 AM on Aug. 8, 2009 in Just for Fun

Level 17 (3,823 Credits)
Answers (20)
  • i just don't care what other ppl thik, maybe i'm negative LOL
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:49 AM on Aug. 8, 2009

  • I think some of it does come with age. It used to bother me much more when I was younger (I'm 35 now). I had this need to be liked by everyone. Now I realize that people that make those sorts of comments/judgements are kind of assholes and therefore I don't really care what they think. Sure, sometimes someone will still say something that cuts me to the quick, most mostly I just shake my head and consider the source.
    deadheadjen

    Answer by deadheadjen at 9:50 AM on Aug. 8, 2009

  • Der. Supposed to read "but mostly". And yes, I'm anal enough to come back and correct myself...lol.
    deadheadjen

    Answer by deadheadjen at 9:51 AM on Aug. 8, 2009

  • I myself am a negative person and always have been, but there are many who use their negativity to punish, be cruel and pick on people. I use mine to be witty, sarcastic and funny. I guess it depends on how you view your self and the outside word.
    IhartU

    Answer by IhartU at 9:59 AM on Aug. 8, 2009

  • Yeah, I use my negativity in a funny way as well (or at least I try to hahaha). It's my negative self-image that keeps biting me in the ass, no pun intended. Damn antidepressants don't work for shit rackin frackin varmit...
    caitxrawks

    Answer by caitxrawks at 10:01 AM on Aug. 8, 2009

  • I still can't get away from caring about what others think about me, even though I am resentful when I consider judgments unfair. And what happens is that I hurt myself by caring. I understand that we can't control anyone's behavior but our own, and to not sweat the small stuff. Other than handling hurt feelings in the work place caused by my supervisors- which can make a difference in employment or pay, negative opinions of strangers are a nuisance. We hope to please friends and family, and when they are hurtful, it is hard to shrug off. When I find myself fretting about something I found hurtful, after ruling out that they might be right and I need to change, I push the thoughts out of my mind. I actually say to myself: "No! I won't think about that." "No! This is not a productive thought." and push it away. If it comes back, I push it away again.
    Bmat

    Answer by Bmat at 10:05 AM on Aug. 8, 2009

  • Staying off CafeMom would help you a ton! Lol.

    But seriously...it would.
    fluud7

    Answer by fluud7 at 10:35 AM on Aug. 8, 2009

  • I'm in the process of cutting out my time on CM, actually. I wrote a long journal post about it yesterday, haha. I was so fed up with all the negative energy floating around here that I couldn't take it anymore. Today I realize that I need to wean myself off it instead of quitting cold turkey.

    Kinda like a cigarette addiction. Hahahaha.
    caitxrawks

    Answer by caitxrawks at 10:41 AM on Aug. 8, 2009

  • I simply weigh how much it really matters in the scheme of things - like, someone says, omg, you let your kid paint his nails?!??!?!1111// And I think, well, yeah, I do. It will not effect his intelligence, it won't effect his health, and I still love him. It makes my son HAPPY. Is their comment going to weigh anything in a year, when my kid is about to go into preschool, when I have a house to take care of? nope. So why should it matter now. I don't plan on revolving my life around one silly comment or a bad day - in a year or a week or a month, or even in hours, it won't effect anything that actually HAPPENS in my life. Like getting in the car to go to work. Or brushing my teeth. And in the nicest way possible, why do you ask so many religious questions or questions you don't want bad answers to? If you don' want to get bashed just freaking avoid the touchy topics. It's pretty simple to subtract drama from your own life.
    Kodeekins

    Answer by Kodeekins at 10:52 AM on Aug. 8, 2009

  • if you dont like me thats your loss.

    its just like my favorite shirt:

    you laugh because im different; i laugh because you're all the same--or my killer fav:

    "YES I DO BITE, BUT YOU HAVE TO ASK, AND YOU HAVE TO ASK NICELY"
    chickaboom73

    Answer by chickaboom73 at 10:57 AM on Aug. 8, 2009

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