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Can you describe the boyfriend behaviors that have alerted you to an unhealthy relationship w/your DDs?

What have you seen and what, if anything, did you do or say about it? My DD just turned 15, and we so far feel she is not the best judge of character regarding the opposite sex. Thanks :)

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dflygirl7

Asked by dflygirl7 at 9:00 AM on Aug. 9, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

Level 12 (751 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • Well...I'm still pretty young and I think there are those girls that are ALWAYS looking for the "bad boy" or the one guy that's going to piss off our parents the mst. lol. Also, sometimes it stems from our parents' choices in the opposite sex. My sister's have crappy men that are just like my step-dad. I did 2 until he joined the Army. The more you say to here or try to do anything about it the more she is going to try and do the opposite.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:08 AM on Aug. 9, 2009

  • Get to know the boyfriend of the week. You may see what she sees, or she may see that he is a loser.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 11:42 AM on Aug. 9, 2009

  • As the mother of a 16 yo dd who have a bf, I can tell you what we looked at to see that he was a Good kid. He has to come around so we can get to know him and I have met both is parents. They both get good grades, like the same music and have the same friends. They enjoy the same things and are happy when together. If he isn't what you would like for her becareful how you go about it. You don't want to push her into staying with him just to spite you. At 15 they should be doing things in groups, the movies, mall or beach they should have a limited time alone. Let her figure out if he is a loser, let it be her mistake. As long as he isn't hurting her this is her lesson to learn.
    wallmom1

    Answer by wallmom1 at 1:43 PM on Aug. 9, 2009

  • Well Im not a mother of a teenager, but My mother used to throw in my face what she saw wrong with my high school boyfriend (and abuser) I lied about it for 4 years, and covered for him.. My mom said these were how she new something was wrong- 1.) he would call 5,6,7 times a day, and talk to me for hours. (something normally a girl would do-however even when I didn't want to talk....he made me) 2.Went through my purse/backpack all the time. (showed he was controlling) 3.) When ever my mom would try to point any of these behaviors out to me, I would throw HUGE fits demanding his innocence. There were many other signs (my mother says) but those were the ones that she noticed the most.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:57 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • My DH and I are taking an approach of not saying anything...we are watching, VERY closely as to her behaviors and such, but if we tell her that we don't like her boyfriend...she will want to be with him even more. Its like forbidden fruit... So we chose to ask her how they are doing and such...it paid off, they broke up!! I am not all for her hurting, but we played it cool and things worked out.
    Ashwee9

    Answer by Ashwee9 at 2:54 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

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