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When your'e arguing with your SO and he says something mean, does he mean it?

Or is he saying those things to hurt you in the heat of the moment? I argued with my SO and he said some very hurtful things, wondering if deep down he really means those things?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:58 AM on Aug. 10, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • People say what they feel when they are angry.
    LuvBug3

    Answer by LuvBug3 at 11:00 AM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • Mine does that too....he'll bring up crap from a long time ago or call me stupid or worse ..my MIL told me to just ignore it and don't say anything back but I usually do...I think they just want to hurt us and they think that will do it.....my problem is that he's "always right" and never apologizes..I guess that's just a man...
    Jan40

    Answer by Jan40 at 11:02 AM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • I think your so, was just upset and you were hurting him in some way and he just felt he needed to say something to hurt you back...somethings can be how they really feel, but most of the really mean things are just out of anger, and are not even how they feel. When things are calm, and your both in a good mood, just mention how hurt you were, and ask him if he really meant those mean things. I'd bet he says no he didn't really mean that.
    robinann5

    Answer by robinann5 at 11:02 AM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • well my hubs has never said anything overtly mean to me when we fight or well... ever... but i know i say HORRIBLE things to him that i dont mean
    pookipoo

    Answer by pookipoo at 11:02 AM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • We don't argue. Period.
    Fistandantalus

    Answer by Fistandantalus at 11:05 AM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • Mine does he tells me he says things just because he knows it will make me mad even if it isn't true. Men are jerks...
    ZachsMom325

    Answer by ZachsMom325 at 11:06 AM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • it depends if he is winning the argument. I noticed that if men are not winning then they say hurtful things to throw you off so in that case, no he doesn't mean it. He's just using words as a tool to win.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:07 AM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • He and I say things that we don't mean but if he know that he hit a nerve and hurt me then he will see it. We don't argue very often but you know I have always said bumps and buises go away and words stay so watch what comes out cause them words you can't take back and laying your hands on someone is no go either. I have a very strong bond and relationship so I don't think he means it but he does know how to push my buttons.
    raemommy

    Answer by raemommy at 11:10 AM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • Yap my hubby does that and swear afterwards that he didnt mean it. He said "I was going to break up with u until I found out u were pregnant!" omg, we were married 3 years before I got pregnant
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:15 AM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • Either he means it or he is a liar.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 11:18 AM on Aug. 10, 2009

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