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is it wrong to not feed my 3 yr until he eats the food i offer?

im tired of always making a "special" meal because he is so picky i've been doing this since he started eating reg food. but he is much older now and i think he should try not eat it whole if he doesnt want to, but he will try mac and cheese and he ate it once liked it then i gave it to him again and he refused it is he really picky or is he just not trying it because he knows eventually i will give him the food he enjoys?all he eats is fish sticks, nuggets, shrimp. 3 gerbers of veggies a day, fruit, pb and j,grilled cheese, more cheese, ham only very crunchy things,any advice thanks

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Asked by rosepetalluv at 2:56 PM on Aug. 10, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Level 8 (249 Credits)
Answers (10)
  • I only make stuff I know my son will eat so if he refuses what I put on the table for dinner then he just doesn't get anything I will wrap the food up and put it in the refrigerator so if he comes up to me later and says he is hungry that is what he eats. I refuse to make special meals when I know he will eat what I have. The only time I make special meals for him is if I know for a fact he won't eat what i'm cooking (seafood, pork and stuff like that..) as for breakfast and lunchtime I give him 2 or 3 choices to choose from with what he eats , if I make it and he doesn't eat then it's just tough for him he doesn't get anything else until dinner time. I do the same with snacks he has 2 or 3 snacks to choose from.

    It's not uncommon for kids to just want one certain food.. My son will eat hot dogs and mac n cheese all day long if I let him I just had to make it clear to him he was eating something more.

    Answer by KalebsMommee at 2:59 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • i would just keep introducing new foods to him.


    Answer by soonmommyof3 at 2:59 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • Also if I make something he has never had before I make him atleast try it if he doesn't like it he doesn't have to eat it but he does have to try it.

    Answer by KalebsMommee at 2:59 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • Nope, not wrong at all. Our 2 year old and 3 year old have to eat what is offered. We have a well balanced meal - so it is not just one item and usually they like something. They get what they are served and nothing else. If they try something and don't like it, I do let them have seconds of what they do like. Trying everything is mandatory and nothing extra is ever made! My boys are both decent eaters but sometimes they will refuse to eat at a meal. It's funny, because we could have the exact same thing another day and they will eat a lot of it. Maybe when they aren't really hungry they decide to be picky! LOL!

    Answer by micheledo at 3:04 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • Not wrong at all. He eats what's put before him or he doesn't eat. Pure and simple.

    Here...we have a "rule"...They have to eat one bite of everything for each year of age. So, my 3 year old has to eat 3 bites of meat, 3 bites of side dish and 3 bites of vegetable. If they clean their plate (I give small servings) they can have something for dessert.

    9 times out of 10 they end up finishing. LOL

    Answer by TiccledBlue at 3:29 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • They say kids need to try something like a dozen times to really develop a taste! Try incorporating new foods in with his favorites! He may surprise you! Let him pick out his fruit at the grocery store, and ask him to help make dinner choices! For example say would you like chicken or hamburger for dinner? The more say he has in the process the more likely he is to eat it!

    Answer by Rebecca727 at 3:50 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • Nope, it's not wrong. Children will not starve themselves. They will eat what you serve (eventually).


    Answer by legalmommy101 at 4:51 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • My daughter use to picky as well. But I put a stop to it...when I knew I would introduce a new dish I would make sure she had her breakfast, lunch and no snack in between. I wouldn't make her sit at the table to eat it, but I did suggest to her that trying new things wasn't hard, and since I knew she was hungry, I would ignore her and she would eventually eat it...whenever we went out, I would always have her try something she got older, she begin to realize that sometimes, stepping outside the box isn't that hard at, things aren't that bad when it comes to her eating something new!

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 5:00 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • I have never made special food for my kids. Once they were able to eat table food I would just cut up or press it through a food mill. They have never been picky, but they have been stubborn and just refused to eat.  Our rule is eat what your given or not, your call, but you don't get an option number 2.  It will not hurt a child to miss a meal or two.  Heck with my oldest son we went 3 days with the same plate for breakast lunch and dinner.  I felt like the worlds worst, meanest, "badesr t" mother in the world, but I also know giving in would not do him any favors down the road.

    Stick by your guns, keep your cool. Make what your child will eat more often than not, but keep at it with the new things. Make one side dish your child hasn't tried with foods that she/he likes.


    Answer by littleredpony at 5:19 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • We have always had a 3 bite rule. even my 19 month old has this rule. I put three bites of everything on your plate. You clean that plate and you can have seconds of whatever you want. I do make a point to have at least one food I know that will eat. Both of my children have had meals that they refused to eat more that 3 bites of some food and nothing else. They were hungry for the next meal. They soon figured out I was serious and started eating all of it. Now the foods I KNOW my kids legitimately don't like they only have to take one 'no thank you' bite of. I do not think it is wrong to encourage you child to eat more of a variety by not allowing them to 'hold out' He will not allow himself to starve. When he is hungry he will eat. Right now it is just a power struggle. Also allow him to help with some of the prep work. Even if it's just can you bring me the carrots out of the fridge? Can you stir this? ect

    Answer by But_Mommie at 6:58 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

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