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why are so many people obessed with others parenting techniques

Ok, when my boyfriend was a child he was spanked often as was I. my boyfriend has wounds on his body from such beatings. yet he will always admit that he had it coming because he would do some crazy things. but now a days everyone is so worried if a mother spanks her child and thinks that she has abused their children. i think that if parents weren't so afraid of CPS and CPS and other mothers would stay out of the parents business to punish their children their way. we would have less attitude and less crime. and better all around manners. my BF when asked questions it doesn't matter by who is always recpectful with sirs and ma'ams and pleases thanksyous. and people respect him because of how polite he is. i want our children to have the same respect he has. and when i ask him why it was because he would be spanked or back handed if he wasn't so i say why do you think that its not ok for parents to teach in this way.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:43 PM on Aug. 10, 2009 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (17)
  • I will spank if need be. I don't care what anyone else says. Kids walk all over their parents these days, because parents are afraid to "parent" their child.
    BridgetC140

    Answer by BridgetC140 at 8:45 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • My about-to-be 14 year old has never been spanked, always says please and thank you, respects her elders, and has better manners than just about anyone I know.

    Please encourage your friend to have therapy, a child should never feel that he or she deserves to have pain inflicted on him or her. Your post made me cry.
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 8:46 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • When I was a kid I was and sibling spanked with my father's belt when verbal discipline and removal of items didn't work. I have spanked my kids but found that didn't work for us. Verbal discipline and removal of items really work better for us. I think people are stressed because our country for decades has so much stress in it that reaches everywhere everyone no matter money or no money partner or single. With more stress in lives outside of parenting comes more stressful parenting coupled with ....... the every day stress of ......... parenting.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:48 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • Spanking and respect don't really go hand in hand. I did spank my kids probably up until the age of 5, and probably only a handful of times each. Teaching respect was easy....I respected them as a person (not just a kid), and we talked about it as well. Spanking was for disobedience. They are adults in their late 20's now, and think nothing of the spanks, because there were so few. They still are very respectful of others, and they demand respect as well.
    EireLass

    Answer by EireLass at 8:50 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • Riiiiiiiight, he carries scars and thinks he had it coming? What a sad self image he has. Yeah, that spanking really helped him... If you leave marks, it IS abuse. Spanking is NOT illegal, and child services does not take children away for spanking.
    apexmommy

    Answer by apexmommy at 8:59 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • my boyfriend has the best selfimage i have ever known he doesn't dwell on it. but when he shot his brother with a cross bow. or beat up his science teacher for trying to break up a fight between his brothers or when he stole his parents car. he feels that he did deserve it. he is the most upbeat positvie person and although he is no where as extreme as his father he still spanks but only a couple of swats
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:08 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • I have a dd that the only thing that works is spanking the other one time outs work. I think it depends on the child. There is a big difference between spanking and abuse. As long as you only spank and never do it when angry I don't see the problem. If any one thinks I'm a bad mom for it F*** them.
    hot-mama86

    Answer by hot-mama86 at 9:11 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • YOU DO NOT HAVE TO SPANK OR BEAT A CHILD TO MAKE THEM RESPECTFUL. You teach them from a very young age to be that way. My son is 13 and hasn't been spanked in over 10 years, he is very respectful and polite. I didn't let him not be that way. When you spank or beat a child, you are instilling FEAR not respect. No one DESERVES to be physically hurt by anyone. A swat on the butt is one thing, but a beating or constant spankings for every little reason is another. To me, spanking is the lazy/easy way out of disciplining your children. Try talking to them, explaining why you want them to act a certain way, teach them/show them what is appropriate. RESPECT THEM AND THEY WILL RESPECT YOU!!!
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 9:30 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • I hope to gain my daughter's respect, not by spanking or "back handing" her, but by being firm with limits and consistent with discipline. Beating the snot out of a kid doesn't teach respect...it teaches them to be bullies.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:32 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

  • It's about discipline. Spanking is fine, but so are other techniques. Kids need boundries and to know that there are consequences for disobeying. I use spankings and time outs.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:41 PM on Aug. 10, 2009

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