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should i say something or just let it go.

my husband has 2 other sons before he met me, a 6 yr old and 4yr old. i compare the baby pictures with our son and the 6 yr olds baby pictures look nothing like his 4yr old and our son, his 6 yr old has blonde hair and blue eyes and has no facial resemblance. both him and his baby mama have brown/green eyes and brown hair. his 4 yr old and our son have a very recognizable resemblance in hair color, face structure and eye color. should i tell him that i don't think that the 6yr old is his or what, my mom and my friends say the same thing. he never took a dna test for the 6 yr old, but he did for the 4 yr old and its his for sure

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:18 AM on Aug. 11, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (13)
  • Is parenting really about blood? Just let it go...
    rkoloms

    Answer by rkoloms at 10:27 AM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • if it werre me I wouldnt say anything. i look NOTHING like my dad...he has black hair, green eyes, tall, olive complexion...I have blond hair, blue eyes, white as white can be!! lol but my sister looks SOOO much like our dad. his oldest may have just gotten most of his traits from his mom...
    landons.mama

    Answer by landons.mama at 10:37 AM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • Sometimes those things can skip generations. My half sis looks nothing like our mom or her dad but alot like her dads mom. Also, if the child is this old, he is already a strong part of their lives. He has been a father this whole time, i doubt he would want to know even.
    Trotterswife

    Answer by Trotterswife at 10:48 AM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • He could get the DNA test if he wanted but either way this child knows him as his father. What does it matter now?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:48 AM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • Let it go.... My mom's brother has five children... Four have blonde hair blue eyes... One boy has bright red hair when nobody else in the family does... But it's his son for a fact...

    Besides that, why take your DH's son from him, if he wasn't his? Why disrupt these children's life? IMO it'd be better to drop the matter
    momma_marian

    Answer by momma_marian at 10:54 AM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • That kid needs him. Leave it alone.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:16 AM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • What difference would it make if you found out that the 6 year old was not his? Why would you want to break dad's heart & the child's heart. Could you imagine what it would feel like if you were told at 6 years old that the man you thought was your father, is really not? LEAVE IT ALONE, all you will do is make a normal situation ugly. Why would you want to put a father/son relationship at risk for un-wanted drama? Get over it, & just know regardless of how the child looks that he is your SO's son & will be forever.



    There were times when i wondered about my ex's daughter, because her mother was cheating on her father. But, i never even thought to bring it up. That girl deserves a loving father, & never would have ruined that for her & him.
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 11:18 AM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • And you're an expert in genetics just by looks?

    My brother has 5 kids and none of them really look like him. There's NO doubt they are his...but there is very little resemblance.

    My own son looks more like my DAD rather than his own dad or me.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:37 AM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • if HE cares about the kid then who's to question the DNA?? Let it go
    kristal2146

    Answer by kristal2146 at 11:52 AM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • Genetics are a funny thing.... Dominant and recessive genes-- you never know what combinations you will come up with.

    There is more to being a parent than looking similar and sharing DNA....

    What does it matter if the child looks like him or not? Think of how harmful that could be to the child. To overhear he can't be his dads cause he does not look like him... or be subjected to DNA testing to prove that is dad.

    Just let it go
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:06 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

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