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I really need some advice on this one, please help me ladies........

So I do not have a relationship with my dads side of the family. I was very close to my grandma his mom, and my aunt his sis. Now my grandma passed away when I was 13, I am now 26 and my aunt just passed away yesterday. I am also 7 1/2 months preggo. I am considered highh risk.

The funeral is in Illinois where I am from, & I am trying to decided if hubby & I should attend. I would love to say my goodbye to her for the last time, but I dont do well at funerals.

My aunt was the only one who knew my son & actually kept in contact with me over the years. She sent wedding gifts and birthday gifts for him. We talked on the regular like every week My dad got married when my mom was preggo & had a child who is 9mths younger than me. She loved me & my fam to death. I had just talked to her last week. I am so stuck & I am looking for advice on what I should do.

Please help me if you can

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 6:38 PM on Aug. 11, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • If you can at all go I would. I just went to a funeral of my ex's Aunt . I hope you can make the right decision for you. You sound like you were close I'd almost hate to see you miss out on that.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:43 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • What would she tell you to do?
    I would recommend sending a beautiful display of flowers and telling your kids all about her for the next 30 years. Third trimester, high risk, pregnancy is not something to play with. Funerals are not the only way to honor someones memory.

    Answer by Staceyj740 at 6:44 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • Stacey is right - what would she tell you to do? That's how you should decide. My grandmother passed away last year - I didn't go to her funeral. I made the 1000 mile trek 2 months before she died. I spent time with her - she was the very reason I went. I knew, when she died, that she would tell me not to put myself is a "bad way" to make the trip when I didn't need to and/or it would put hardship on me (and it would put hardship on me). So, I didn't go.

    Answer by PaceMyself at 6:52 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • You dont want to do anything thats going to harm your new baby, If you can go that would be the right thing to do, out of respect and love that you got from this person. What ever decision you make you will have to live with , My advise is to pray about it and God will show you whats right? Hope this helps you in your decision

    Answer by sweetnhonesty at 6:53 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • Thank you ladies so much for responding. I have been thinking about this all day long. I have not seen her in 3 years, but we did talk almost every week. I want to go just to be able to tell her goodbye, but at the same time I would hate to go into premature labor being so stressed out and crying all day long. She has tried to get the rest of that side of the family to contact me, but it has not worked. Even my dad was suprised when she told him that she maintained a relationship with me and my family. He has not even seen his grandson and she has. I dont know. My hubby is behind me 100% in what ever I decied, but I still dont know.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:53 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • If you can go... go... you will always look back at this moment in time ... if you can not go, send a letter to be read by the family on all the great selfless support she gave you and your family... let them know how much she impacted who you are and what you have become. My thoughts are with you.... best wishes

    Answer by BlessingsBegin at 7:02 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

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