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Am I pushing??

So my son can always count to three, and sometimes five (it depends on if he's paying attention, distracted, etc)... Today we were in Mcdonalds, and I asked him how many chicken nuggets he had... He counted to three, and then looked at me... There was three, and a half eaten one... So I had him recount with me, and we counted to four. I then asked how many nuggets he had... I do this with a lot of things. I'll hand him two crackers, he'll count them, and then tell me how many there are. I thought I was doing a good thing, until a woman (in mcdonalds) walks up (we were outside in the play area) and says.... "My kids wouldn't ever count when I pushed them liked that."... I just smiled and said yeah he's a pretty good kid... Am I pushing? Do you have your child count things? If he doesn't want to, I don't make him. But he usually does the first time I ask...

 
momma_marian

Asked by momma_marian at 8:08 PM on Aug. 11, 2009 in General Parenting

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Answers (13)
  • Youre not pushing if hes generally interested and he WANTS to do it. Its also like making it a game. As long as hes cooperating then dont worry about it. Now if you had him writing out how many he had and dividing it by the square root of 144 and then adding the number of people in the room...well, thats pushing...LOL. Some people are just insecure about what their kids can do versus other peoples kids. I have no idea why people keep comparing their kids to others. Sounds like hes motivated to learn. Thats great! Motivation is WAY more important than actual intelligence. Motivation keeps you progressing. Hmm, Im thinkin Im craving mcdonalds nuggets now...LOL
    momofsaee

    Answer by momofsaee at 8:18 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • That is not pushing your child, it is teaching. Dont mind strangers they always have their unwanted imput. It is never wrong to teach your child, and if you stop when he doesnt want to do it than what is the harm??
    Mikayla_lynn

    Answer by Mikayla_lynn at 8:11 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • I do that with my daughter too...I can tell when she starts getting bored with it..don't worry about what anyone else thinks or says...she probably said that because hers couldn't count..
    Jan40

    Answer by Jan40 at 8:22 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • Yes, you are being pushy... thats what public skoolz be for. What do you think you are.. a homeschool teatcher? Geez...
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:27 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • nah...or at least if you are being pushy, then I'm like the pushiest mom ever b/c my boys and I do stuff like that all the time...counting, letters, sight words, patterns, colors, you name it we do it...the kids like it and I feel like I'm doing my part in getting them ready for school. If they don't wanna engage, we just don't do it....

    I think it's fine to have him count things if he wants to...it's certainly not going to hurt him! :)
    drewandian

    Answer by drewandian at 8:38 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • then i fall into the pushy category as well. we count cars, i ask her what letters are on signs when we are in a line, ask her to count stuff when we're eating or in a line, ask her what shape and color things are. and now that shes 3, i'm asking her to add stuff (like count the red balls now the green balls how many total kinda thing) and as long as she doesn't get whiney or tired of it i'll keep going. they have to learn somehow and if its fun than that makes it easier all around. just ignore people they are mad they didn't teach their kids and now their kids have been held back for however many years b/c they don't attempt to do anything at home.
    vabchmommy

    Answer by vabchmommy at 8:42 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • I don't feel that you're pushy. I think its' safe to say her child wasn't able to count at that age, whether she pushed or not. :)
    apexmommy

    Answer by apexmommy at 8:51 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • No, I don't think it's pushing. I think it's great that you are finding ways with everyday things to teach your child! That woman should mind her own business instead of walking up to a total stranger and handing out unsolicited advice. Besides, just because her kid was stupid doesn't mean that teaching them like that is wrong. ;)

    She's lucky you didn't say "Who asked you??"

    Keep it up! A parent is a child's best teacher! :)
    mugsysmommy

    Answer by mugsysmommy at 9:03 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • I also do colors and shapes....and abcs. He picks his shirt... I'll give him the choice, between say, his yellow spongebob shirt, or his blue fish shirt... We play a form of hide and seek, where I hide a toy, and tell him it's under the bed, or on top... Under the pillow, etc... Then he'll hide it ( usually in his shirt) and tell me "gone mommy gone"... We also work daily on body parts and sign language. We also read every day. We've come to really like Dr. Suess...
    I try very hard to ignore these comments, but sometimes, I just wonder if maybe they're right... My son could go to preschool next year, and if he does I want him to be prepared. I don't want my boy starting school and not knowing how to count, or know his abcs... I'd like him to know how to write his name. I believe it's my duty, as his mother, to teach him this.
    momma_marian

    Answer by momma_marian at 9:14 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

  • You're not pushing.

    Preschool is for teaching what you already are teaching him, so if you're teaching him all that stuff now, there's no point in him going.

    Go with his flow, follow his lead. Don't worry about knowing the ABC's, work on recognizing them. Worry about the order later. Shapes, remember there is a difference between a rhombus and a diamond, and work on the correct names. Remember 3D shapes too.

    Writing letters is an ADVANCED skill for a THREE year old. Don't worry about it. If you do, remember correct positioning of the writing utensil and the correct way to write the letters (top to bottom)

    Be prepared for him to be bored in preschool if you're going to teach him all of this. I have two who are at least 2 years ahead of their peers academically and cognitively...we're battling boredom in kindergarten and preschool already.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:34 PM on Aug. 11, 2009

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