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Not sure how to deal with this?

Just a little background info. I am a Christian and my husband is not. He was when he was younger but his dad is a very in your face evangelical and completely ruined it for him. I really don't care for my FIL i tolerate as best as I can. They may sound mean but I've never been big on preaching in peoples faces, I believe my relationship with the Lord is private. My FIL likes to analyze everyone's relationship with Christ.....(Ex. what they read, watch on tv, etc.) I've been praying for my husband daily. I work very hard to not be over bearing like his dad, this approach has been working really well. Whenever we're around my FIL he makes assumptions about my relationship with the Lord and acts like hes better than me. Then he likes to shove the bible in my husbands face and say here this verse is for you. this drives me crazy because then I have to start all over again reassuring my DH. How can I get FIL to stop??

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:33 AM on Aug. 12, 2009 in Religion & Beliefs

Answers (8)
  • You might not be able to but there's one greater than Him and that's God...he can turn it around for you and being a Christian woman, you know that nothing is impossible for God...take it to Him in prayer and allow God to handle the situation...

    Answer by mom2mybabes at 11:37 AM on Aug. 12, 2009

  • Stay away from fil in closed sets, quiet places. Only gather with him in malls, in pubic restaurants. Avoid playgrounds with him. Once he starts up state firmly if he doesn't immediately stop you and grandkids will immediately leave. Keep your word. He gets in your face cause you're giving him the response his ego needs.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:44 AM on Aug. 12, 2009

  • Pray for your FIL. I would probably stay away from him as often as possible. He is doing more damage than good.

    Answer by feesharose at 11:50 AM on Aug. 12, 2009

  • I like the verse (can't quote it cause I don't read daily...), that says THERE IS ONLY ONE JUDGE. THAT JUDGE IS GOD. If you guys do go visit, say to yourself all the way there "the joy of the Lord is my strength" and when he starts in on the attacking, tell him that there is only one judge, and it's not him. God knows your heart and his and hubby's. God is THE ONLY ONE who knows, though we all try to "know", we really don't. Hope this helps, and just keep praying for peace in the family and for everyone to see God's trueness.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:42 PM on Aug. 12, 2009

  • My husband and I believe in God very much so- but we have had a strain on our relationship with my brother and sil because they are so in your face about religon- and the worst part is that the last time we visited them we drove and hour and 1/2 to get "whitnessed" to- it was so terribly uncomfortable for my husband - and they never take the time to ask what we believe, they just assume because we don't do everything they do that we are in the wrong- goes against Christianity to me...

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:31 PM on Aug. 12, 2009

  • Your FIL sounds irrational and nothing you can say or do will ever change that.  Your best bet there would be to visit as infrequently as possible.

    My advice would be to talk to your husband and try and help him to see what his father is doing.


    Answer by beeky at 1:45 PM on Aug. 12, 2009

  • I would avoid him. He's just pushing his son further away.

    Answer by DrJChappell at 4:49 PM on Aug. 12, 2009

  • This is really between father and son and obviously goes back a looong way. If your husband wants his father to stop, he needs to be mature enough to say so. But you are the wife - make your voice heard! You and your husband are now {one} ... what affects one affects the other. You and your husband need to stand up to his father. Do it in a united front and make it clear to your FIL that he does not determine how you two run your lives or marriage. If this doesn't work, walk away and cut all ties until FIL 'gets it". If however, FIL is responding to something your husband says or does when they are in the same space, step away from it and let them hash it out.


    Answer by wildflowergal at 6:43 PM on Aug. 12, 2009

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