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is money an issue in love?

say you were younger, like early twenties.. so you still have time to change your income by going to school, looking for a new job etc. and you were striving for the best by going to college. but your SO has a not so good job where he can barley afford anything and doesnt seem to have any motivation to go to school, learn a skill or find a better job. would love be enough to stay with him even if he cant provide all you want and need for you and your family, or would you leave him for someone who had more motivation and wanted to give you and your children more?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 1:08 PM on Aug. 12, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • I found out that, as a mother, I am the ultimate decision maker in my and my child's life. If a man wants to be my second child, he's out!! Make an ultimatum with you husband. If he doesn't comply, then consider going to school yourself. Apply for housing and onsite childcare.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:28 PM on Aug. 12, 2009

  • If I had a child with him, I wouldn't leave him because of that. Everybody is struggling right now.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:17 PM on Aug. 12, 2009

  • i would definitely be upset if my SO had no interest in bettering his situation for himself and his family. is there anything you could do to encourage him to go to college or find a better job? my SO is starting school this fall & is 22, so he's a late starter. he was really nervous about it for such a long time, but then I started school last fall & he saw how much I loved it & now he's totally pumped. maybe your SO is scared or nervous? guys sometimes have trouble expressing those kinds of feelings. i would try talking about it before making any extreme decisions.
    Wheepingchree

    Answer by Wheepingchree at 1:18 PM on Aug. 12, 2009

  • Love is not enough to sustain a relationship. I know that sounds weird but it is the absolute truth. You can love a man until his socks fall off, but if he refuses to work and support the family, then the relationship is doomed to failure. You, of course, can decide to stay with him or you can leave him, but if you choose to stay, you will end up resenting him and your love for him will eventually turn to disgust if not downright hatred. If you have the option of going to school and attaining a means of supporting yourself, then that's what you should do, unless it is going to cause someone else to suffer. I'm thinking in particular of children. If you have children who need things, then you will probably need to work at something to provide for them. It is very difficult to go to school, work and take care of a family. That would be spreading yourself a bit too thin. Should probably wait until kids are in school.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 1:28 PM on Aug. 12, 2009

  • when I was younger I thought love conquered all. Now I know it doesn't. I could have married money and decided to marry for love. Stupid me. Looking back I don't even think it was love as much as it was neediness and lust.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:20 PM on Aug. 12, 2009

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