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New SAHM... need help!!!

Hello, 2 months ago a lost my job and DH and I though it would be better for me to stay home, I have two daughters 2 1/2 yo and 4 mo. I have worked since I was 16 and I feel totally lost, I love staying home with my girls, and enjoy the fact that I can now have a home cooked dinner for my hubby everyday, however sometimes I feel stressed that the I don't seem to have my house completly clean and laundry done... there is always something missing and I hate the fact that my working friends think that I spend the day laying down... I always knew that being a SAHM was hard work, but now have so much more respect for the women that have always done it!!! I really need some pointers on how to manage my time, sometimes I cannot even find time to do my hair or makeup and I hate my husband to see me like this... I always try to be ready for him :) please HELP!!!


Asked by Avy1930 at 6:31 PM on Aug. 13, 2009 in Just for Fun

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Answers (7)
  • Welcome! Lol. Well being a sahm is hard work, and people who work and have never stayed home with children will always have the notion that we veg out all day, but as you're already seeing, it's far from that! If your friends think that, just shrug it off. You know how hard you're working. Don't worry about the laundry and cleaning so much, it'll drive you nuts. Sometimes I throw a load in once we've eaten dinner and finish it after the kiddos are sleeping, but usually I'll get it out of the way when they're napping, and if it's not finished, oh well. My kids are close to yours in age, I have a 2.5 year old and an 8 month old. I don't know your husband but I'm sure he's not gonna be upset if your hair isn't perfect or make up isn't done, after all I highly doubt that's the reason he married you.

    Answer by tnm786 at 6:48 PM on Aug. 13, 2009

  • get up earlier in the morning and shower and get ready. makes a ig difference in the whole day. I worked out a schedule for myself and stuck to it. works great and the housework is done

    Answer by Mesha125 at 6:33 PM on Aug. 13, 2009

  • Okay... at one point or another... my DH now gets terrified if he comes home, the house is spotless, everyone is dressed nice and i have make-up on.
    He immediately panics and asks me what's wrong.
    Because... I have lost the battle to my home, my son, and my dogs.
    I do the very best that I can in cleaning up, doing laundry, cooking lunch and dinner for my husband -delivering his lunch - and all that jazz.
    Just do the absolute best that you can - and that'll be appreciated by your DH all the same.

    Answer by K_Sawyer at 6:34 PM on Aug. 13, 2009

  • Im a sham.
    I have twin girls that are 19 months,
    what really helps me and my girls is a set schedule. they wake up everyday at 7:30am, get dressed(I pick up the close the night b4) eat breakfast, which is usaully done by 8 or 8:30, then they have play time (either inside or outside) they eat lunch at 12:30, and then we all clean up,and I put them down for a nap (a trick to do is take them outside about 30 mins b4 nap time and theyll be knocked out) when the wake up I give them a snack and start cooking dinner, and then we have family time. then showers, bedtime story, and lights out at 8:30pm.
    when ever they take a nap..doing things for urself. it makes u feel alot better.
    Hope I helped

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:39 PM on Aug. 13, 2009

  • I don't know what to tell you really except that it took me just under one year to give up on my great vision of what a stay at home mom was supposed to accomplish, and fell back, HARD into reality. My house is never clean, most of the time DH makes dinner when he gets home from work, and by the end of the day I look like I just got hit by a bus. The most important things are all I get accomplished: Keep the house from burning down, Keep the kids from commiting any type of felony against eachother, get everyone to and from school, and make sure homework gets done.

    Answer by 3gifts.from.god at 6:43 PM on Aug. 13, 2009

  • Your daughters will need you at home much more from around 12-18, than they do now. Maybe you should find a new job now, and when you girls are older you may be able to cut your hours to part time.

    Answer by rkoloms at 6:51 PM on Aug. 13, 2009

  • You have to find a routine that works for you.
    While I'm stumbling around blindly in the morning I gather up some laundry. I throw a load in and then go have a cup of coffee and a bit to eat and get the kids breakfast. Then I workout while the kids play. Sometimes my daughter will work out with me (it's cute). After that I jump in the shower unless it's extremely hot or a big cleaning day.
    After my shower I usually do some lessons with the kids. My kids are homeschooled. They start with independent work while I pay bills and play with the toddler wash the breakfast dishes, move the laundry around.
    Then we do lunch.
    The toddler takes his nap and we do lessons that involve me teaching or doing experiments and crafts.
    When the toddler gets up we usually all go outside and play until I need to go make dinner.
    Make dinner. Eat. Clean up. Other than stories and bedtime, I don't do much work after dinner.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:59 PM on Aug. 13, 2009