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Have you ever?????

thought about one of your exes? I've been thinking one of mine ALOT for the last 2 weeks. And I LOVE my bf, but for some reason, I can't seem to get my ex out of my head. Does this make sense? Why is this happening? It's not like I still see or talk to him. I live in PA and he lives in New Jersey which is almost 7 hrs. away & it's been like 15 yrs. since we've seen each other. And what really confuses me is that I REALLY WANT TO SEE HIM. I even called his mom today @ work & she gave me an address for his ex bc he gets his mail through her (don't know why????) and I've been looking online to try to find out how I can find a current address & phone # for him but I'm not having any luck, ANY SUGGESTIONS as to how to find him??????????? And please, NO BASHING, I'm already confused enough.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 6:03 PM on Aug. 14, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (6)
  • Well... why don't you just call his mom and ask for his number? Or an email address? Or... mail him a letter at that address that his mother supplied to you with your contact information.
    Just say that you've been really thinking about him (and a few other people that you two might know, if you feel comfortable name dropping a bit more than just honing in on him alone) and say that you just want to do a catch up. Meet up - chat online, etc.
    And I would keep your current bf in the loop. so nothing gets misunderstood and blown completely out of proportion.

    Answer by K_Sawyer at 6:11 PM on Aug. 14, 2009

  • if you're confused already, not a bash with mean words or thoughts - a question, why confuse your 'love my bf' by getting around with ex? I'd tell present bf let's separate a while cuz don't want to dishonor him.

    seen close up what behind the scenes digging does and it hurts a lot.

    since you have such a strong instinct to see and be with ex, just honor present. whichever one fate means you to be with - either ex or present - you'll get back with one of them.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:31 PM on Aug. 14, 2009

  • try or

    Answer by admckenzie at 6:37 PM on Aug. 14, 2009

  • I don't want to "dig" or "get around" with my ex. I just want to see him, see how how he's doing, etc. And even if he's still with her or someone else, it doesn't matter. When we broke up, we broke up as friends and continued to talk after and sometimes gone for coffee. So, I guess you could say, it's more like a "how have you been, long time noe see or talk" kinds deal. But the part that I really can't figure out is why these feelings are sooo strong to want to see him after all these yrs. And as far as my currebt BF is concerned, things are good so it's not like I "want to see if the grass is greener on the other side". It's more of a friend contacting an old friend to catch up. Does this make any sense????

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:42 PM on Aug. 14, 2009

  • I don't think it is like a friend contacting a friend. If it was just curiosity about what's going on in his life then you wouldn't go through the extent you are trying to go through. I'm not bashing, but if you are feeling a strong desire to see him or contact him, that can be a sign of a possible problem. What if you see him and feelings are rekindled? Or if you talk with him and there is an emotional bond that is re-established? That can put you in a bad situation. If you are confused, then I would separate from your boyfriend and figure out what it is you want. Good luck.

    Answer by LaceyAM at 7:49 PM on Aug. 14, 2009

  • is he on Facebook? that's how I've found several people that I went to school with - yes even one ex but I didn't "friend" him.

    Answer by the3jsandme at 10:30 PM on Aug. 14, 2009

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