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Would you take a child to see a parent that is incarcerated?


Asked by TrendyMarlin at 6:03 PM on Aug. 14, 2009 in General Parenting

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Answers (14)
  • I did when hus spent 1 mo. in jail. It's not fair for the kids to be punished too. And it's good for the person in jail too because after the short visit , all they can do is sit there and think about the visit. If it hurts the person incarcerated enough, they will do anything to never go back to incarceration. You follow.

    Answer by lastraw at 7:37 PM on Aug. 14, 2009

  • depends on what thay are in for. I probally would because i wouldnt want my child to feel that their father abandoned them. I would let them know that he did something that he shouldnt have and he's going to be kinda in a 'timeout' for a while. If the childs older I'd be as honest as I could without going in to details

    Answer by Mesha125 at 6:12 PM on Aug. 14, 2009

  • It truly depends on the circumstances and the child. I have said no and yes professionally to parents I have worked with when asked this question. The answer is: only if it benefits the child and it is well thought out. If the benefit is only for the parent: no. Although I think this is such a complex question and it really does depend on a variety of variables: that is the short answer. Way who really benefits.

    Answer by frogdawg at 6:29 PM on Aug. 14, 2009

  • I did for a while, but, one day at a visit I realized,if he really cared about his kids,he would have been home that night when he broke the law, I also realized I was taking food from my kids mouths,when I was putting money on the books for him. My kids are now grown and he is still incarcerated,they have chosen to send him birthday,holiday cards,that is their choice. Too many times men may broken promises while in prison.


    Answer by Anonymous at 6:32 PM on Aug. 14, 2009

  • Nope. If they did something stupid enough to get arrested, convicted and sent to jail I wouldn't be married to them either. I'd have every bit of protection I could to keep him away from the kid,t oo. I don't care what the infraction was.

    Answer by Anonymous at 6:35 PM on Aug. 14, 2009

  • No way would I do that. My niece's mom is in jail, and the judge ordered me to never take them to see her, because he feel jail is no place for a child to visit a parent. Besides, most of them do their time in jail facilities that are far from your area. I say "NO", I would never want to go visit anyone in jail, let alone a kid.

    Answer by ambr2006 at 7:08 PM on Aug. 14, 2009

  • I would never take my child to visit anyone in jail, not even a parent/sibling/grandparent, etc. My biological father was in prison numerous times during my early years and I remember quite well having to visit him there. Not pleasant memories, and I would not want my child having those same memories. Seeing your father/mother/brother, etc in jail is dehumanizing. It is not an appropriate situation for children.

    Answer by mnt_2_b_mommy at 7:17 PM on Aug. 14, 2009

  • Of course I would take him. He deserves to see his father no matter what the circumstances are. And life is not fair and we all go through traumatic times, but the fact is that they need each other and it wouldn't be fair to keep them away. Unless his dad murdered someone I would take him.

    Answer by vmonica17 at 7:22 PM on Aug. 14, 2009

  • I think it would be cruel to not allow a child to their parent, even if the parent is in jail. It might even do serious psychological damage to the child.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:32 PM on Aug. 14, 2009

  • It fully depends on the situation. My SO is in jail right now for 8 year old warrants, he turned himself in because it has been holding us back from moving forward in life. He is a different person than he was 8 years ago. My point is, I did take my kids to see him and they did really well. I stopped because they are too loud and the rules of the visitation building is that you have to be quiet so we would get kicked out if i continued to bring them. If their dad was a continuous trouble maker than no, b/c if he cared about his kids he wouldn't be out doing things that would get him put in jail.

    Answer by mikeyjavimami21 at 7:41 PM on Aug. 14, 2009