Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Uncomfortable in relationship. Please help

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 and a half years, but the last 6 months I've been really uncomfortable around him. I don't have a lot of money and it doesnt bother me. What does bother me is that he tends to make fun of me because I can't afford a new mercedes like he just bought. Then he makes it an issue when he buys me dinner. I can pay for myself i tell him but he says no. His materialism has gotten really bad recently and I'm the exact opposite (appy with what i have. I don't know what to do, Talking to him doesn't help. it just seems to amplify it

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:28 PM on Aug. 15, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • Move on. You have different goals and money is a big problem for couples. If he is a jerk about it now, he always will be.
    Teachermom01

    Answer by Teachermom01 at 8:30 PM on Aug. 15, 2009

  • Leave the relationship. There are alot of things that can be worked around, but there are a few very basic things that can't, and goals/values is one of them. You're ideas on financial issues sounds very different than his, and neither one of you is right or wrong, just very different. If it's so important to him that you have wonderful things, then he should be giving them to you, not ridiculing you because you don't have them.
    EireLass

    Answer by EireLass at 8:36 PM on Aug. 15, 2009

  • I agree with Teachermom01. You shouldn't stay together if you're not happy. Life's too short to spend it with the wrong person. Be glad you see this now, before you get married.
    geminigirl18

    Answer by geminigirl18 at 8:37 PM on Aug. 15, 2009

  • wow money should be 50/50..he sound horrible..holding money over you head like that. you may want to rethink this superiority issue he has. it could really ruin you relationship
    ARRI23

    Answer by ARRI23 at 9:42 PM on Aug. 15, 2009

  • maybe you should look up the word Narcissist and see if his picture is there! Guys like that only get worse. His self centeredness and unhealthy attraction to what's not important in life will keep pushing you further away so maybe you should find someone who agrees with you in spirit and in what's important.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:09 PM on Aug. 15, 2009

  • My bf is the same way.. They just want to feel like they are above you in some sort of way. Men like that will never be with a woman who is successful and rich. They thrive off of using their "money" as an upper hand. He'll wine and dine you and then treat you like shit about it. I get it all the time. Been with my bf for 5 years now.. nothing new anymore, when he starts I just go "oh here we go", or I'l get back at him by saying.. "your damn right youre paying for dinner thats your job". It pisses him off but as long as he gets the fact that I could give a shit less what hes paying for, he doesnt win! lmao...
    I love my bf, weve been together a long time but if I had known he's be like this years ago, I wouldn't have chosen him as my life partner. Think strongly about whether you can handle this or if this will break you down. Eventually it does get worst, the fights get worst and verbal abuse can come from it. Be careful.
    youngfirsttimer

    Answer by youngfirsttimer at 4:14 AM on Aug. 16, 2009

  • Wanted to add its also a self esteem issue with men like that, they feel that the only thing they are worth is money and when a woman doesnt agree with that they only lash out more. You might notice if you speak about school or anything that has to do with becoming more successful in life, he might act as though he doesnt care or even be rude about it... if not already then its coming soon.
    youngfirsttimer

    Answer by youngfirsttimer at 4:16 AM on Aug. 16, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.