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What should I do when my son has a temper tantrum?

My sons is overall a great kid, but he has been having these temper tantrums lately. When he wants something and he doesn't get his way he gets upset (like most children). They say dont give in, and most times I don't. He just keeps yelling. My boyfriend (but not his father) eventually gives him what he wants. When he is at work and I am alone with my son, he doent respect when I say no. I tried spanking him (he gets even more upset and throws his toys at me), I tried putting him in time out (he wont stay where I put him), and I tried the positive approach by re-directing his attention to something else (he didnt want anything else). What should I do?

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Gari0902

Asked by Gari0902 at 10:51 AM on Aug. 16, 2009 in Toddlers (1-2)

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Answers (8)
  • lock in him in his room take away all his toy except for the bed and let him stay in there and ignore him. and only give him one toy a day back until he has all his things back and if he acts up one day no toy that day and take away one u already gave him. he will either keep throwing temper tants and have no toys, or just give in and learn he isnt gonna get his way and he might as well behave.
    ggiovanni

    Answer by ggiovanni at 10:57 AM on Aug. 16, 2009

  • make sure he is in a safe environment, talk softly to him, and then walk away. he will come to realize that you are not going to stand for that nonsense.
    CookieZenmilk

    Answer by CookieZenmilk at 10:58 AM on Aug. 16, 2009

  • At this age kids don't have the communication skills to tell you they are really MAD.  Temper Tantrum is a way to express it and get it out.  Acknowledging that he is mad (asking him "are you mad?" then say "I know you are really mad because you want...., but you can't have......).  Give him a hug, and then go about your business and don't give in. 


    See some books on Anger/Acting Out/Temper Tantrums http://www.cjkidz.com/parentsgrandparentsteachers.html

    momjs

    Answer by momjs at 11:11 AM on Aug. 16, 2009

  • What age is he? I tend to agree, if he don't respond to discipline... i.e., a spanking... put a gate over his door and don't let him out of his room.

    Now before you do that, of course, make sure his room is totally safe..

    My daughter used to go in there and tear everything out, because she was so mad. To which, she stayed in until it was cleaned up..
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:16 AM on Aug. 16, 2009

  • When my kids do that I pay no attention, because that is just what their looking for.
    twotwinsmom

    Answer by twotwinsmom at 1:29 PM on Aug. 16, 2009

  • I walk away or ignore my 1 year old when I know it is just a "not getting her way" temper tantrum. She stops pretty quick and goes about her playing.
    LilCaprica

    Answer by LilCaprica at 4:13 PM on Aug. 16, 2009

  • UHm.... I'm pretty sure I'd get him in a bear hug and try to get him to laugh. Best way to break the cycle is laughter!
    Arisce

    Answer by Arisce at 4:48 PM on Aug. 16, 2009

  • She couldn't of said it better : At this age kids don't have the communication skills to tell you they are really MAD. Temper Tantrum is a way to express it and get it out. Acknowledging that he is mad (asking him "are you mad?" then say "I know you are really mad because you want...., but you can't have......). Give him a hug, and then go about your business and don't give in.


    Through out this process you need to remain calm. If you get upset at him it only makes things worse. You don't want to let on to him that you think he is bad or get mad...then that means you don't have control of the situation either.
    these processes take a couple days or weeks for some children to grasp...So just be patient and things will calm down and he will start to understand.

    placing a child in their room for 1 minute until you can calmly adress the matter is good too. and then talk to them.
    DDTSMommy

    Answer by DDTSMommy at 8:43 PM on Aug. 16, 2009

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