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anyone else feeling the stress of being a mom?

I am a new mom. I am so stressed lately. I feel like I have to do everything. I have to clean the house, wash the clothes, take out the trash, lately I have to cook, I work in the evenings, attend college in the daytime, chase after our crawling 7 month old all day while doing my college homework, make sure dh has money so he can eat out seven days a week while at times I have no food at the house for me to eat, I have to clean up after him and his grandmother, I have to clean her house, wash her clothes, and doing various errands for her during the day,and now that she has had a heart attack I have been volunteered to take over taking care of her also. My day is full of things to do as soon as my feet hit the floor. And when I say I'm tired...due to the fact our son doesn't go to sleep til 2 or 3 am and I have to be up by 9 for class...my dh asks why? He doesn't help me do anything and is always helping his friends.Help Me

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TACXBCBJC

Asked by TACXBCBJC at 1:38 AM on Aug. 17, 2009 in Babies (0-12 months)

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Answers (8)
  • Does your husband work? Because if he isn't you sound like super woman to me! Bless your heart!
    pookipoo

    Answer by pookipoo at 1:46 AM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • you poor thing. Its one thing to take care of sick grandma, but I'd be damned if I'd be taking care of him too..he's not sick or disabled..why does he have to eat out seven days a week anyways? I'd stop doing everything for him..put yourself, your son, and grandma first..he should be helping you..he needs to grow up and take care of his responsibilities.. he's as much his son as he is yours.
    2boymama

    Answer by 2boymama at 1:50 AM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • he works at a library delivering books and puts books on the shelf. But he only works four days a week. I work Monday-Saturday...But I'm a mom 24/7 but I'm at my wits end.
    TACXBCBJC

    Answer by TACXBCBJC at 1:50 AM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • He works at a library! Wow! Have him pack books and a lunch, if he's able and fit enough to stockpile books and lift , he sure has enough stamina to pack a silly easy manageable lunch, you aren't supposed to have to worry about his eating habits, when he sounds so selfish. He never cooks? Stop doing all those things he expects, and takes for granted. If you omit these he may snap at first, but just ignore his whining. Trust that this will just be him angry more about his pettiness of not having it all, he sounds like a little girl getting his way. I know children who would learn to do things and never complain, He needs to grow up!!! What a brat!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:59 AM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • First of all, I would stop doing things for your DH. He sounds like my SO. I stopped washing his clothes. I stopped fixing his lunch and have dinner prepared for him. I refuse to put his dishes away. I tell him to do a chore a day. Whether it be load the wash or take the trash out. Yes, it's like having an overgrown child. Make him fix his own lunch and take care of himself. Explain that your hands are full with grandma and the baby. If he has a problem with that... too bad. Try to arrange to have someone watch your son on the weekends (DH?) and go out and have me time for couple of hours one day a week. That's important! You're a person, too. Don't run yourself ragged.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:30 AM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • I stopped washing his clothes. I stopped fixing his lunch and have dinner prepared for him. I refuse to put his dishes away

    Id never treat my husband that way


    Yes I am stressed OP
    What you need is a night to your self .

    I would also Tell him he needs to help . Set aside somethings and explain to him that you are stressed and it is hard on you having to do it all .
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:34 AM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • i feel the same way lately..i dont do as much as you do, but i feel like i have to do everything! im not working, but going to school..i have to wash dishes, wash clothes, wash bottles, clean the rest of the house, find time to make something to eat for myself, while trying to take care of a 2 month old...shes not old enough to entertain herself so im constantly doing something with her..hubby works at night and sleeps most of the day away..until he gets up to go to work again...so pretty much im with the baby 24/7 and he gets away with only feeding her if she wakes up in the middle night...it might not sound like that big of a deal cuz im not working, but it sure does wear on you..everybody needs a break..you need to tell him your overwhelmed..even supermom needs a break!!
    MaciesMommy09

    Answer by MaciesMommy09 at 3:43 AM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • I don' t do nearly as much as you do, but yes, there are times I'm so stressed out. My DD is 5.5. mos. and I work full-time. It was esp. difficult when she wasn' t sleeping through the night and I'd have to get up and be at work with so little sleep. I thought I would die! But I think you need to make your SO help, it's just not an option. You can't do all this by yourself and it can be a dangerous thing to push yourself too hard. Sit down with him and tell him specifically what he needs to do. Men are not like us, they don't have the initiative, but if you tell them to do something, most oftentimes they will. Start with that and make sure to get enough rest. I know that a nap always made the difference when I was at my breaking point. Good luck . This is the part of motherhood that no one talks about.
    danielp

    Answer by danielp at 5:34 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

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