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Have you ever had to break off a freindship that you have had for a long time? How did you do it?

I have freinds witha girl for 4 years but i think it is time to call it off.. i have gone out of my way to hep her and she treats me like crap.. she also is asbusive to her kids.. i need to be around better people .. but its hard to end a freindshio advice please

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 9:46 AM on Aug. 17, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (10)
  • i have done it twice..first time it was a friend for 7 years and she would eye my man so friend or not i had to watch her..needless to say i didnt watch her well enough..and that was it i called her said a few things and to never call me again and she tried to call me i didnt answer i was done..second time friend of 2 years i did everything for her and her 2 kids babysat gave money helped her threw alot then i realized i was bending over backwards for her and she only caled when she needed something. so i decided i wouldnt bend over to help if i didnt want to i wasent going to..my son at the time age 1 1/2 had a sezior (sp) and she called me a month later..not only to see if he was ok but to ask if i could babysit her kids, i said i couldnt and why and she freaked i was selfish and a back stabber and what not..i threw my hands up and said im done all because i wouldnt babysit. thats not a friend. and i just stoped talken to
    tabbys4

    Answer by tabbys4 at 9:55 AM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • No, Ive never had to, but I have had friends that sorta drifted away because we had nothing really in common to keep us together. If you dont want to be friends anymore, then I would not call her, not answer her calls, not answer her emails, texts or any part of communication. Likely after the first ignore, she will leave you alone. If shes persistent, then you might need to sit her down and say..hey, this relationship isnt working for me anymore. Just curious as to why youve let her abusive ways go on this long? I wonder about things like that because I am a very strong personality who doesnt take crap off other people and I guess I just want others to learn how to stand up for themselves. Good luck with this and if you really dont want to hang out with her, then dont. Dont ever feel obligated to be with somoene that doesnt add something to your life. Friends should never take. Friendship costs ME something.
    momofsaee

    Answer by momofsaee at 9:58 AM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • to her..i refuse to be a doormatt. so u have to be strong and just know when u are done and be done..u will find better friends. u will always think of the kids and just hope for the best but sometimes its better to walk away. now neaither of these friends were abusesive towards there kids so on that i dont know...but best of luck hun it can be hard but it can be done...xo
    tabbys4

    Answer by tabbys4 at 9:58 AM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • I just did it recently. I texted her one day randomly asking her if she was still screwing one guy. She said no and then tried to be all friendly to me. I told her to knock off her shit because she wasn't my friend because a friend would willingly have sex with a guy who raped a friend after the fact. Haven't heard from her since but she still has me as her number 1 friend on myspace.
    purpleducky

    Answer by purpleducky at 10:21 AM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • I have ended a long-time friendship with 2 close friends. They were like a Mom & brother to me (they were Mom & son). In my case, it just happened. He was upset when I needed to pick up something from his house because I hadn't called him in a while (a few weeks or a month, Idk). He said things trying to be hurtful & he revealed what I had suspected he had felt for some time (just judgment that my divorce was no big deal, etc). I didn't need it any more. I had intentionally not called because I realized they were both too negetive, critical, & judgemental and I wanted to see if either of them would call me for a change. He felt I should have to checked on him b/c he was going through a custody dispute. I didn't see why it should just be on me to keep in touch. It sounds trivial but, it was more than that.

    BubbaLuva

    Answer by BubbaLuva at 10:46 AM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • I realized that the friendship wasn't building me up as much as is was bringing me down. They had both been wonderful friends for a time I can't take that away from them but, we grew apart. No one speaks to me the way he did. He had gone off on me before when I had done nothing to him, that was the last straw. He said he didn't want to be friends anymore, I said fine. I think he just wanted me to apologize but, I'd done nothing wrong. Roughly a year later, he left a voicemail crying needing a friend but, that was too little too late. In the msg he wanted to keep it between us that he called me, knowing him it was b/c he had sh!t talked about me to everyone & it would make him look bad to come crawling back.

    BubbaLuva

    Answer by BubbaLuva at 11:04 AM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • Pm me if you'd like to hear more, there is so much more, or if you think I can help. GL! You can do this, and you DESERVE to be around positive people who treat you right!

    BubbaLuva

    Answer by BubbaLuva at 11:06 AM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • First stop helping her out. Do not call her. Do not answer your phone if she calles.
    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 11:21 AM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • i had a friend in AL who was really just needing someone to listen to her BS about her stupid husband. after we moved she continued to call just to discuss him. it was slowly pissing me off, she didn't get any hints, she was stubborn and wouldn't listen to "no" at invites. so i just quit answering the phone. it's been 3 years, she still emails, i have no idea what she wants or expects.
    usually the casual distance and stoppage of phone calling did it for me, but not with this one.
    jewjewbee

    Answer by jewjewbee at 12:41 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • Just be honest. What's wrong with that? Why do you all have to be so pansy about it?!? Be a good person at least & have the decency to just say you dont want to be friends anymore.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:01 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

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