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I'm married but separated from my husband. I recently found out that I was pregnant with another man's child. Both my estranged husband says he supports me in whatever decision that I make and the father of the child also wants the child but he has gotten a bit distant since I told him. I just don't know what to do about the whole situation.

 
jhaniyahc

Asked by jhaniyahc at 4:21 PM on Aug. 17, 2009 in Pregnancy

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Answers (11)
  • Wow, women on cafemom can be real insensitive b*tches!

    You're human, you made a mistake, life goes on. First off- you need to decide whether or not to keep the child. If you decide it's not time, I would advice against abortion and for adoption. If you want to keep the child- then awesome! That's the first step.

    You need to have a serious talk with the man that is the father and he needs to decide whether or not he's going to be there for you and the baby. If he decides against it- when the baby is born, get a dna test and once its proven that he IS the father- collect child support!!

    And calm down.. children are blessings! =)
    SinCitiChick

    Answer by SinCitiChick at 4:31 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • Good luck then
    staciandababy

    Answer by staciandababy at 4:22 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • wow-shitty situation.
    Most states will not grant a divorce until AFTER baby is born... In wisconsin, if your pregnant during a divorce you can not get a final hearing until DNA is proven.
    JnCV

    Answer by JnCV at 4:24 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • You really should finish one relationship before starting another. I know that doesn't help you now, but for future reference . . .
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:25 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • calling jerry springer!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:26 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • Wow..well men are picky. A lot take care of other men kids but at the end of the day that's ur baby. Don't abort. Take care of ur own child. Where is the father? You need HIS support not ur 'ex' husband. Its just going to slap u in the face anyway. For future reference. If u having doubts about caring for a child. Use condoms
    tremother23

    Answer by tremother23 at 4:27 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • I would take a step back from both of them and focus on you and the baby... The men shouldn't matter at this point. Yes the baby needs a father but the bio-father needs to decide on his own if he's going to step up. As for your Husband, he may be supportive now but it might all change once the baby's here. There will be resentment etc.. You need to put the child first and do whats best for he/she.
    MrsLeftlane

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 4:27 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • Honestly, I don't see how we can help. This is a mess. Do you love either man? Looks like you're having the baby so you really have to allow the father of the child be the Dad, if he is willing. Not much choice here. I do wish you good luck, I think it'll work out.
    jeanclaudia

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 4:27 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • Really, Sin, cause I think we're all just being honest. This is a crappy place to be.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:36 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • I agree, it is a crappy place to be. But she's asking for advice, not put downs! Don't you think she KNOWS she's in a crappy place? Jeeez people!!
    SinCitiChick

    Answer by SinCitiChick at 4:38 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

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