Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

How do i deal with this? (loss of a pregnancy and jealousy towards another pregnant mother)

I had a miscarriage and weeks later a friend of mine announcned her pregnancy.. shes due weeks after i was (i had an early miscarriage).
I was happy for her, but deep down i was filled with immense jealousy. Ive kept my feelings to myself.. i felt there was no need to share.
a few weeks ago i found out she had an abortion only months before concieving this baby. again.. after months of still trying.. and still not getting pregnant my negative feelings returned for her. how is this fair? i know i shouldnt feel this way.. but i do.. i hate it.
to top things off. today i find out what she wants to name her child. it was a name i had picked out if/when i have boy/girl twins *i know the chances of that are slim,... but still*
i cant help but take all this personally, even though i know its not meant that way.. i know its my own crazy jealousy..

has anyone else ever felt this way? how do i get over these crappy feelings?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:20 PM on Aug. 17, 2009 in About CafeMom

This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • Your feelings are normal. VERY NORMAL. I think almost every woman who has had a miscarriage has feelings like this in some form. All I can tell you is to give it time because TIME will EVENTUALLY help you in this area. I won't say it will take the pain of your miscarriage away because it won't. You hang in there and just take it one step at a time. =)
    firenicecream

    Answer by firenicecream at 9:47 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • Personally I would not be friends with her anymore. Her having an abortion would be my main reason. I had 2 miscarriages and I could not stand to be around people who took their pregnancies so lightly bc I wanted it so bad! This might make me a horrible person but it's me. Sorry I can't help you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:28 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • Why would she keep a baby so close after aborting one?

    On the name thing, that's a little strange
    staciandababy

    Answer by staciandababy at 8:34 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • i guess she felt it was a sign that she was meant to have another child.. and she just accepted it this time
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:40 PM on Aug. 17, 2009