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In response to the virginity thread: when do you want your kids to start having sex?

Hey all,

I'm just the Teen section we see a lot of questions from concerned moms about their kids being sexually active, but in the "When did you lose your virginity?" question I saw that most moms lost it between ages 15 and 20.

Realistically, how old do you think your kids should be when they start being sexually active?

Are you going to teach safe sex or push for abstinence?


Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:50 PM on Aug. 17, 2009 in Just for Fun

Answers (11)
  • When they get maried

    Answer by looovemybabies at 11:51 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • Never. Ever.

    Realistically though, I expect to start stressing about it when they're around the ages of 17-18. They'll have more freedom then and I'll have to loosen the reins a bit to allow them to make their own choices. I have been teaching safe sex since the 7th grade, when the school had a sex ed class.

    Answer by benjamink at 11:55 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • I teach my children both safe sex and abstinence. Im sure there are people out there that think you cant do both, but you can. I have explained to my children that it is better to wait until they are older, or even married, but that isnt ALWAYS realistic thinking. I have taught them about birth control, diseases and the responsibility of sex and all the emotions that come with it. I dont expect them to have sex before they are adults, or as close to it as they can get. I also talk to them about other people they know that have sex, not in a "oh they are bad" kind of way, but more on the what is going on in their life that makes them think they need to look for love/sex at such young ages. I also talk to my childrens friends about safe sex, someone needs to and some of the parents I have heard about dont even care what their kids are doing, but if they are hanging out with MY kids, I DO care what they are doing

    Answer by SuperMomof3kids at 11:58 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • 18...hopefully not but that seems to be kind of old compared to some.

    but I will teach about safe sex and push for abstinence

    Answer by Dom123123 at 11:59 PM on Aug. 17, 2009

  • I would love it if my kids finish college, get married, and have sex for the first time on their wedding nights. that would be perfect.

    I don't think anyone should be having sex before 18, period. Kids are not mature enough for sex. We will be teaching abstinence until marriage, just like we were taught (which worked) but my kids will also know the facts of life and what not. I won't be naive about it, but I will definitely encourage abstinence.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:02 AM on Aug. 18, 2009

  • yaa i was 17 the first the world we live in today i will not push for abstinence (although that would be nice) all i know is i wasnt educated about sex at all!! so i will be teaching my daughter about safe sex, and to respect her own body, and that, especially for the first time, that it should be with someone special. as for a certain age, i dont know. i would hope shewaits til shes at least 17 or 18...but, i think thats pushing it!! im also gonna do my best to make sure shes involved with extra cirricular things to keep her outta trouble and what not..all we can do is our best!! :)

    Answer by alexis_06 at 12:06 AM on Aug. 18, 2009

  • i lost mine around 16 and i tell you that when my kids get older i will push for no! i'll talk about both but reall in these days i'd head toward the answer NO. i want my kids to do what i didn't and that means to wait. There are to many things out there that can not be cured.

    Answer by Monkie-00 at 12:14 AM on Aug. 18, 2009

  • Well since I plan on locking them up forever and ever....never.

    Answer by summerm at 1:44 AM on Aug. 18, 2009

  • I hope my son waits until he is *at least* 18. That may be unrealistic though. lol. I will absolutely teach him safe sex practices, as well as general sex-ed and about pregnancy and STD's...since by the time he's in school, there probably won't BE sex-ed classes with all the people out there lobbying against them. ;) As far as how old I think he'll be when he becomes sexually active? I couldn't tell you. He is so young still it would be pointless for me to speculate. I was 17 and I lost my virginity to my long-time boyfriend who was also a virgin. My mother taught me (age appropriate) sex-ed beginning when I was 7. I went to her and mentioned the possibility of becoming sexually active. Of course she wasn't happy and we had a long talk, but she also took me to the doctor the next day and got me birth control. I always used a condom along with the birth control, I never caught an STD and did not get pregnant before planning it.

    Answer by jessnpaulie1014 at 5:29 AM on Aug. 18, 2009

  • I waited for my husband and expect my dd to do the same. She is 9 and knows this already. For my son: Hubby waited for me and we expect our son to do the same. He is only 4, so we'll talk about that with him later.

    Answer by Pnukey at 4:18 PM on Aug. 18, 2009

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