Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

What would you do or say if someone told you you have failed as a mother when you have done nothing wrong?

My not yet MIL does not like the way we do things with our kids. She is always sticking her nose in our parenting. She thinks my SO (her son) is treating our son wrong which he isnt if he was I would have done something about it. So now she says that I have failed him as a other because I "Let" him be treated that way. What would you say to her? Would you be mad too or would you just let it go. That is what my SO said was just leave it alone do make it any worse. Then he wason the phone with her an hour later talking like she had never said anything. What do I do?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:32 PM on Aug. 18, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (4)
  • I have been told that. By my oldest daughter. About how I raised her. She didn't like how strict I was. I told her I raised you the best I could. You never went to jail, got in trouble. Or got pregnant before you turned 18. I think I did a good job.

    Answer by louise2 at 1:45 PM on Aug. 18, 2009

  • I think it's too late to say anything about it now, but if she says anything again, step in and stand up for the way you raise your children. If she thinks HER SON is treating the children wrong and YOU'RE a bad mother for it, what does that make HER? SHE IS THE ONE THAT RAISED HER SON! It's not your responsibility to raise adults...Just tell her that you raise your children how you want and if she has a problem with it...leave you alone. If later on this incident is still bothering you, bring it up to her and tell her that it really irritated you when she called you a bad may not help anything, but it will get it off your chest and be out of your hands.

    Answer by mammacjjc85 at 1:50 PM on Aug. 18, 2009

  • some mother in laws SHEESH!.......My ex mother in law was this way. If you werent parenting her way, then you were parenting wrong. She still watches my daughter afterschool.....the bitch even tells people that my daughter lives with her (she does stay there a few nights a week, her dad lives there). But, going & telling people that she LIVES with her, really gets under my skin.....

    Just laugh it off, next time i would joke & say "Well, you obviously couldn't do much better" haha, i would think it's funny. You would be somewhat making fun of your husband too, but that can be fun sometimes. Especially if your trying to be smart w/ your mother in law.

    Answer by samurai_chica at 1:50 PM on Aug. 18, 2009

  • give an example so we can better advise

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:04 PM on Aug. 18, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.