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Body Language

They say body language is 90% of a persons thought process during a conversation. So, if I'm talking with dh about buying a house together and that as soon as he gets his Masters Degree in another year and he's able to get a better paying job, we can be better qualified for a home, what should I think if dh has zero response to that conversation? I'm concerned and when I was talking with him about it, he felt no need to contribute any thoughts to the conversation. I'm a little afraid to approach it. I do know he doesn't like to feel completely responsible for ownership of a home, but, he's not because I have a down payment already from the death of a relative, so I feel I'm contributing in that way.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 8:45 PM on Aug. 18, 2009 in Money & Work

Answers (4)
  • You know him best, so you should be the one to interpret his body language. Sounds to me like he had something else on his mind and he probably wasn't really paying attention while you were talking.
    EireLass

    Answer by EireLass at 8:49 PM on Aug. 18, 2009

  • Did you repeat yourself and ask him to answer the question? If he didn't I would ask him to ask the question. I wouldn't let him not respond unless he then said he doesn't want to talk about it. Not responding at all is not good. I would talk to him about it again. Maybe he just wants to get a better job first and you can be gathering all the information in the meantime to make sure any concerns he has can be addressed and backed up by references.

    SylviaNCali

    Answer by SylviaNCali at 10:08 PM on Aug. 18, 2009

  • Maybe he thought you were just talking. If you don't establish a give and take converstation environment men can be unclear of what is going on.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:32 AM on Aug. 19, 2009

  • Well, any talk of the future sometimes causes him to shut down and it's irritating to me. He's the one who decided on his own to go get his masters degree while we are in a recessional slump. He says it's ultimately to increase his income with a better job in order to have more money to do things. But, buying a house is a necessity that he doesn't seem to want to deal with. When I asked him point blank in his own words to tell me what he see's his increase in pay changing in our future, his exact words were: "to buy a house "or" have extra money to do more things like travel." He knows buying a house is a foundation we need right now, so the "or" word he used threw me for a loop. Not sure if owning a house is a priority for him at all and this is the part that scares me.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:02 AM on Aug. 20, 2009

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