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I feel horrible

So about a year and a half ago, only a few months before i got married, i had an incident with another man. Nothing serious. Just a few kisses on the face and some cuddle time. Well, my DH called me when this was happening and was rightfully pissed that i was not at home and that i was with ppl he had never met. And stupid me, (and i still dont know why i did this) but i lied to him. I told him nothing happened and i hid things from that moment on. I flirted with other guys and things, never with any intention of ever cheating. ...but i was very inappropriate with other men. ...Well, i was feeling horrible about myself (my DH treats me very well) and i havnt committed any of these acts for about 6 months or so. But of course my DH found out about everything. And i confessed and i cried. And he has forgiven me, and loves me just the same. ...but now, how do i forgive myself? How do i move past what i have done?


Asked by Anonymous at 10:25 PM on Aug. 19, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • Be a better person. DON'T do it again. Think about him respectfully and hopefully you will act the same. Do things to show you love him and appreciate his understanding and love for you. You f*cked up, now own it and move on. There's no point in dwelling, just do better next time.

    Answer by jeanclaudia at 10:31 PM on Aug. 19, 2009

  • Well only you can answer this one. Maybe you should pray for some guidance. You are the only one with power to forgive yourself.

    Answer by lowencope at 10:32 PM on Aug. 19, 2009

  • Day by day. Forgiveness isn't something that you just do and get over. It takes time and a lot of work. Every day work to do better. Be the best wife that you can be, strive to be the woman you know he deserves, the woman he fell in love with. It will take time, but eventually you'll look back and you won't believe how you've grown.

    Answer by beckcorc at 10:42 PM on Aug. 19, 2009

  • be lucky that your husband forgave you. he must see you in his future and loves you soo strong that he can forgive. im not bashing i have been married for almost 3 years and i had an incident with anotherman..i hate myself for this and i wish to hell i never even laid eyes on this loser.

    my husband attempted to forgive me but he just cant. he says he loves me but he cant get past it.

    forgive yourself because your husband forgave you..put it in the past and move forward WITH EACH OTHER. remindhim how grateful you are and love him dearly. good luck

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:05 PM on Aug. 19, 2009

  • Understand that although he forgave you, he may not trust you the same way for a very long time if ever. You'll have to earn that back, and you won't be able to say "well, he doesn't trust me anyway so I might as well do caused whatever he ends up feeling. If he really can forgive and not look back you are one lucky girl, and need to do everything in your power to never betray him again.

    Good luck, I hope you guys are able to work through this.

    Answer by ohwrite at 12:01 AM on Aug. 20, 2009