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Selective Mutism

My 4 year daughter has been severely shy since infancy and experiences a lot anxiety in social situations. I have been googling severely shy toddler/preschooler and stumbled upon selective mutism.
We are talking to her pediatrician next week at her 4-yr checkup. She's been in preschool since last September and has not spoken to anyone yet (teacher or students). She is starting to interact now that she goes 5 days per week, but no speaking. I'm using the Internet as a means to get educated on possibilities. Not trying to diagnose her myself.

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Asked by kk05 at 8:03 AM on Aug. 20, 2009 in Preschoolers (3-4)

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Answers (4)
  • I was extreamly shy as a child. I have grown out of it some now. Shy children have a tendency to not want to talk to people. It is just part of being shy. One thing I will say to you. Do not push her to hard into social situation that she is uncomfortable with. It will just make her scared.

    Answer by louise2 at 8:16 AM on Aug. 20, 2009

  • Don't try to diagnose her with the internet. If you feel there is a problem, then talk to your pediatrician. Being shy is not selective mutism. There's a myriad of other things it could be, and it also could be shyness.

    I know someone with a child who has been formally diagnosed with selective mutism. It's MUCH more than being shy. WAY more.

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:33 AM on Aug. 20, 2009

  • My daughter had a friend that would not talk to the teacher or any of the students when she was in preschool. She was in my daughter's kindergarten class and would only talk to my daughter. I met her mom before school started at a meet the teacher and she asked me if my daughter would be E's special friend. We set up playdates for them to get to know one another and she would whisper to my daughter, only whispers. Whenever E needed something, the message was communicated through my daughter in kindergarten and 1st grade. They were separated in 2nd grade and this year, but she's been at my daughter's bday parties and although she's still very quiet she is starting to talk to other little girls. Sometimes it just takes time for kids to get comfortable. Encourage a friendship with just one or two friends in her class that she can get comfortable with, set up playdates, get to know their moms.

    Answer by missanc at 10:30 AM on Aug. 20, 2009

  • Don't try to diagnose her with the internet. - ANON 8:33a

    What part of this "I'm using the Internet as a means to get educated on possibilities. Not trying to diagnose her myself." found in the OP's statement didn't you some how understand? Good Lord, it would behoove some of us to read and meditate on what the actual question and statements surrounding the question say.
    OP- I think you're doing the best thing by trying to find other options of trying to help your daughter. Not everything on the internet is wrong or non helpful. Using this combination of the internet along with your daughter's Dr. is a step in the right direction in regards to helping her overcome her shyness. Best of luck.

    Answer by Ladybugkisses76 at 11:27 AM on Aug. 20, 2009

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