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moms who's kids are in or past elementary school age - were your kids invited to lots of birthday parties?

Do you think it's ok to send in birthday invites to your child's classroom for them to hand out WHEN the entire class is not being invited?

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Asked by Anonymous at 1:55 AM on Aug. 21, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (5)
  • I think it's mean to not invite the whole class. I would hate to feel as though I'm leaving a child out

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:10 AM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • I call the teacher and pre arrange a in class b-day party, i bring cupcakes, juice and treat bags for the kids to take home. the kids love it and that way no one feels left out. Generally if we invite anyone from class to the big party at home i know their parents and we take the invite to their home if i dont know them i send a note to their parents asking for their phone number so i can talk to them, teachers are normally willing to help pass along a note to another parent. Our school actually asks that parent not send invites to school but some parents still do and kids still get hurt.

    Answer by 3_ring_circus_ at 2:43 AM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • My sons are going into 2nd and 6th grade, they do get a lot of birthday invites. Usually how it works is the birthday child will give the invites to the teacher and the teacher will slip it into the other kids backpack or mailbox or daily agenda. They are not handed out in front of all the other kids. But if the teachers didn't do that or wouldn't allow us to send birthday invites to school, I'd just call the individual parents, there is no way I could afford to do a party for 20 or so kids. Plus while my sons are friendly with all their classmates, they are not friends with all of them, not to mention the whole "girls are gross" thing that boys have.

    Answer by canadianmom1974 at 8:00 AM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • No - my kids school actually prohibits the handing out of invites at school unless the entire class is being invited. My kids get invited to4-5 parties/year each.

    Answer by missanc at 9:07 AM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • My kids are in high school. One time when they were in elem school we invited the whole class, and that was a mistake for a lot of reasons. BUT - it is VERY rude to invite some kids and not others if the invitations are being done at school.

    The way we handled it was they simply asked their friends for their phone numbers if they didn't already have it (without getting into why). Then I called the parents and invited the kids / got their addresses and mailed the invites to them.

    I also taught them that they shouldn't talk about their birthday parties (or any other parties for that matter) in front of kids that are not being invited - it's rude and exclusionary and hurts people's feelings.

    Now that they're in hs, they still do that (not talking about it in front of others, giving the invites outside of school) and it has always worked well for us.

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 9:33 AM on Aug. 21, 2009

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