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Does a mom who has a section give birth? Some moms feel so guilty over no vaginal that they feel they've not given birth at all. WT?

I read here so many mommies to be and new mommies are upset for being induce, having a section. I had a horrible labor and was sick, hospitalized on ivs afterwards for a good amount of time. I still bonded fine with my newborn and I never felt cheated out of birth. My son was delivered from my body where he grew. How he got out mattered far less than my ego needing a ride on a specific birth experience.

What about you, did you have a section after a labor, a section right away, a labor and vaginal birth? If you were sectioned and don't feel good about it, why? Who's made you feel guilty that you 'didn't give birth not a mom cause of a section'?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 11:35 AM on Aug. 21, 2009 in General Parenting

Answers (30)
  • I don't know.. I HAD to be induced due to gestational diabetes but I also had an epidural after 37 hours of labor and because I was numb all the way down there, I sometimes feel like i didn't give birth either and feel bad for even having an epidural now..

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 11:40 AM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • I had an emergency c-section after 23 hours of terrible labor. I was very upset about having to have a c-section, but I still gave birth to her. All of those hours of labor, HELL YEAH I gave birth to her!

    Answer by BridgetC140 at 11:40 AM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • I had a c-section and I feel like I gave birth just like other mothers. I had a normal labor...and my babies position was not good, so we had to do a c-section. I still experienced labor, and pushed and all that good stuff...I feel like it does not matter how he came out he came out of me!

    Answer by Rebecca727 at 11:42 AM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • Some moms are harassed by family members who feel that if they don't give a vaginal birth they are not considered a woman. My SIL have to have a c-section after pushing for nearly three hours. They kids head was way to big! Her FIL thinks she's not a real woman because she did not give birth naturally. I got a feeling her next time around she will try for a vbac because of that stupid FIL of hers.


    Answer by soonmommyof3 at 11:45 AM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • oh maxmommy WHY? Because you didn't FEEL him being pushed out cause of epidural? I'm op.

    Bridget - way to go MOMMA -I went in to labor loosing my plus a friday morning two weeks late and contractions started that night irregular til after midnight early tuesday morning then sectioned. Being by then two and a half weeks late past my due date it just wore my body down. His birth of labor then section and my next two sections sure to h&!! were birth epidural or not, labor or no, even being sectioned. I wasn't the one watching another's labor and surgery I was the one in surgery. The 10 days I spent after my first baby's birth hooked up to ivs were well worth it cause my baby made it to being born. My epidurals just eased my pain a bit. My second epidural wasn't even strong enough, I vomited during surgery cause it was so painful. Babies 3 grew in me and came out of me I gave birth.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:47 AM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • i had a c-section and i dont feel guilty at all and i love my son just as much as i would of if i pushed him out of my vagina.

    Answer by PURPULbutterfly at 11:57 AM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • It's mostly the mothers who had "natural" birth" that make c-section moms feel like horrible mothers. It's them that say that the c-sections moms "didn't give birth". What a slap in the face!

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:57 AM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • I had all 3 natural and honestly could care less if someone has had a c-section, eppi, or w/e. Everyones experience is different even if it's a vag birth. I was blessed with 3 healthy boys, when I went into have them I really didn't care how they got here, just so they got here safe and healthy.. Don't worry what others think, then you're giving them the power over you. You're a Mom, thats all that matters!

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 11:58 AM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • I had a C-section with my second child and I will admit that it felt different than the first time around. I would never consider myself less of a mommy for having the section, and having experienced birth both ways I don't know which was better or worse!? I didn't realize that I would still bleed so much after the section, that was a total surprise. I think the recovery from the section was harder than a vaginal birth, I was in pain for a loooong time after surgery. The one bonus was being able to have my tubes tied at the time of birth, a decision that DH and I had made when I got pregnant the second time.

    Answer by emnasmom at 12:00 PM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • I'm very much a natural childbirth advocate because evidence shows it is best for mother and baby when both are healthy. Many women really DO have unneccessary surgury to give birth to their babies (the WHO recommends a section rate of absolutely NO MORE than 10% with a goal of 5% in most populations). However, that is not to say that those women didn't give birth to their babies! Labor and birth are hard work no matter how you decide to do it, naturally versus induction or pain medication or surgury. It doesn't make any woman any less a mother or any less a woman for opting for those choices in childbirth.

    I believe a woman must give birth how she is most comfortable. A woman who is terrified of labor pain is not going to have the same blissful afterbirth bonding experience with her baby if she is forced to endure it. I do encourage everyone to educate themselves, though, and be their own advocates.

    Answer by Ati_13 at 12:14 PM on Aug. 21, 2009

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