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Is anyone in an open relationship??

I have been thinking about having an open reltionship with my husband just wanted to know how it work for you and what kind of rules are in place.Thanks for any imput not sure if we are going to do this but the spark is gone for both of us but we still love chother and dont want to get divorced so looking at other options.

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:08 PM on Aug. 21, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • I recently just cheated on my husband, which I love dearly but am BORED with.. Instead of feeling bad, I want to do it MORE. I'm thinking of telling him, and trying to make it an almost positive thing. I guess if you're comfortable enough with him being with other women, it'd be okay. I'm not sure how I'd feel about it yet though.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:11 PM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • you not sure but you cheated on him? he needs to do his share
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:16 PM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • yes. We are both free to see other ppl if we want. The only rule is that we don't throw it in the other's face. He likes hearing I'm with other ppl. It's a turn on for him. I choose not to be with others right now so have to make stuff up or share stories from my past. It is NOT a turn on for me to hear he's with other women but at least he's not lying and sneaking around. He loves to chase women. I can't stop that so I just ride the wave. He doesn't always catch them! lol It keeps me from taking him for granted. It makes me work harder at pleasing him and making him want to be with me rather than others. He tells me not to take it personally when he is with others. Hard to do sometimes but I'm understanding more each day that he chooses to be with me bc he likes me as a person and the others are just temporary playmates. He has no feelings for them, it's just the chase to see if he's "still got it".
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:18 PM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • Thannks for your imput and to a pp i didnt and havent ever cheated on my dh that was someone response.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:26 PM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • I love that, admckenzie. I posted the first answer. If I could talk my husband into something like that, I think we'd both be a lot happier.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:26 PM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • Oh for God's sake. That is adultery you are talking about. @@ If you lost a spark, get counseling. But don't cheat. It is a selfish, immoral thing to do. WHY did you even get married?
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:43 PM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • i was in an open relationship for a year,but wasn't the primary girlfriend. he lived with her for about 6 or 7 yrs when i started seeing him. for the most part it worked for me. He mainly saw me,his primary GF, and 1 other girl, then occasionally others. He would normally spend about 3 days at a time with a girl- long enough to not argue. His primary GF seemed to mostly be with a female roommate of theirs. Sometimes, he invited me over and she HATED IT. His GF was an awesome person and I never understood what was so great about it except he was able to jump on every girl he met. It seemed like it really hurt her to have girls paraded around her all the time. It almost always seems that open relationships involve pleasing the man,really- that the man gets other girls and the woman is w/other girls(instead of a guy). I didn't really take him seriously about caring for me, but he was my guaranteed sex every week(always protected)
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:33 PM on Aug. 21, 2009

  • CONT. (3:33) I told him often that he should drop this open relationship nonsense and just be with her- because she was always there for him. Eventually, I met a guy that I really wanted to be with and told him I couldn't be with him anymore- he seemed devastated. Recently, he wrote me and said he was in love with me(9 yrs have passed)- I told him I could never take someone like him seriously. About a year after we ended, his GF found another BF and kicked him out. In theory, it sounds great, but I think in most cases, ppl get really hurt.Sometimes, the swinger thing works okay for a couple, but not the actual dating other ppl while still together. Looking back, he was very romantic and nice to me and we shared alot of good times. I wasn't jealous bcuz I didn't think of him as mine. But I felt like his real GF deserved better.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:44 PM on Aug. 21, 2009

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