Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Seriously need some advice! ASAP!

Ok so I just found out that my grandma just died (my dads mom) the problem I'm having is that today is my daughters 4th birthday party as well. I wasn't very close to my grandma and I'm torn between supporting my dad by going to the hospital or staying with my daughter at her party. I don't want to appear selfish and heartless but like I said I wasn't close to my grandma, she was in a different state most of my life. So I really need some advice. Thanks ladies!

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:53 PM on Aug. 22, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (10)
  • Not to sound heartless.....your daughter is alive and well and your grandma isn't anymore...sadly. It's times like these, when people pass away, that we need to really take inventory of our lives and really figure out what/who is the most important. I couldn't imagine a better place than your daughter's birthday party!

    Also, have your dad come....explain it to him.....It's best to be around giggling, smiling, happy 4 year olds than in a hospital where you just want to cry....I'm sorry to hear about your gramma......
    clhadley

    Answer by clhadley at 12:58 PM on Aug. 22, 2009

  • I would stay at the party with your little one for a while and then excuse yourself to go comfort your father. You may not have been close to your gram but your father needs all the support he can get.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:59 PM on Aug. 22, 2009

  • Have the party then go to your dad.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 1:06 PM on Aug. 22, 2009

  • Have the party, she and your dad would want that.  Go support him after the party.

    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:11 PM on Aug. 22, 2009

  • Have the party. Celebrate with your daughter. But then definately go be with your dad and support him. Your grandma and you may not have been close, but that was his mom and he needs you.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:13 PM on Aug. 22, 2009

  • Call your dad and tell him you will be there after the party as your daughter needs you. I'm sorry for your loss.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:32 PM on Aug. 22, 2009

  • Since the party is already planned, and it is for your daughter, I would say stay with the party and then when it is over go to your dad. I am sure he realizes that you have the party going on and would not expect you to miss that.
    I am sorry for your loss.
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 2:03 PM on Aug. 22, 2009

  • stay at the party with your daughter and when its over go adn be with your dad grandma isnt going anywhere and neithe ris your dad but its your daughters birthday and she derserves to have a mig to do made out of it
    katiekruschke

    Answer by katiekruschke at 2:43 PM on Aug. 22, 2009

  • Why is your Dad still at the hospital? Did it just now happen before you typed it in?
    You made plans, invited guests etc. I'd call your Dad and explain to him the problem and I'm sure he'll say "you need to be there for her, you only have one 4th birthday". But do call and offer him some support, and as soon as you can, go be there for him. I don't think I'd go today tho, I'd do the calls today. Your daughter will get her feelings hurt maybe if you leave on her birthday and once you see him it's going to affect your mood whether you're close to grandma or not.
    lisa_ann_p

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 2:44 PM on Aug. 22, 2009

  • I SUGGESTED GO TO YOUR DAD...JUST SIT DOWN AND THINK FOR A MINUTE WHAT WILL YOU DO IF YOUR MOTHER DIES AND LETS PUT IT LIKE THIS AND ITS YOUR FATHERS BDAY AND HE JUST STAYS AT THE PARTY HAVING FUN..ITS TRUE IS JUST ONE 4TH BDAY BUT THIS IS ONE TIME THAT YOUR DAD NEEDS YOU THE MOST BECAUSE YOUR DAUGHTER STILL HAS MORE YEARS TO COME BUT THIS LOSS JUST HAPPENS ONES AND YOUR FATHER FEEL SAD AND BAD TODAY NOT TOMMOROW OR NEXT YEAR SO I SUGGESTED YOU THINK ABOUT IT .GOOD LUCK
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:18 PM on Aug. 22, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.