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I have a 14 year old son, whose bucking against everything I tell him. I'm a single mom, working two jobs, don't get home until 8:30 p.m. I just keep praying that he will change soon and grow up.

My child is very smart. I don't have the resources to put him into positive activities. But one thing that is going in the right direction, is that he is talented in basketball. He just falls by the wayside after basketball. Then wants to scram to get the right grades to pass. I told him that is going to catch up with him soon.

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Asked by Anonymous at 1:07 PM on Aug. 22, 2009 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (9)
  • Praying may help, but its not going to make him grow up. This will be the hardest years of all. 14-18 they say. Make sure you try to spend some time with him even if it means cutting back on your hours. Your child is more important than anything and he really needs you to be strong for him right now. he is going thru alot emotionally wether he admits it or not. His hormones are raging and his attitude is changing daily. Read a book on dealing with teens, and you may get some good advice from DR's and it will help you out.

    Answer by forevermom75 at 2:01 PM on Aug. 22, 2009

  • That's how they do and it doesn't stop until they get in their early 20's, after they've taken a few knocks on the head and or wallet. I'm going through it right now with the last of ours, our 14 y.o. daughter. Things that make perfect sense to you and I, she knows the benefits and problems with behavior or lack of, examples of situations she's seen--can mean nothing. I'm telling her, the dr. is telling her, the coach is telling her, other parents are telling her--or let's say suggesting to her- but no action on her part. Most of them don't have that ability to realisticall foresee the consequences of their actions.

    Just stay as close to and involved with him as you can mama. See if other relatives can get involved, too. Are there other extra-curricular school activities he can do? Have you checked on youth church programs (they're free)? Good luck!

    Answer by mama_k228 at 5:43 PM on Aug. 22, 2009

  • I hope you find the answers, and share them with me, because honestly, I'm about ready to throw my 17 year old out! I won't but I told him today that if he doesn't straighten out, it's a promise that he will be out of my house on his 18th bday in 7 months. Then he can live however he wants without worrying about my rules, etc..

    Answer by gludwig2000 at 6:50 PM on Aug. 22, 2009

  • This is very typical behavior of teens.

    Have you checked into your local Boys and Girls Club? They charge a very minimal fee and teens really love it. They get to doing many fun activities with kids their own age. If you cannot afford the yearly membership fee, they have scholarships available. No one is turned away if they cannot pay the fee. Our local club charges $60.00 during the whole school year.

    A plus is that they get help with their homework as well if they need it.

    Good luck to you and your son.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:21 AM on Aug. 23, 2009

  • i too am a single mom of 3 boys their dad died this year. i dont always have the means for a siiter for the 2 younger ones. but yes this is tough times for us who have teens. but if you must take the sports away. they all want to test new limits at this age. so we need to set new rules and harder consquences. famous words from my parents"they have to respect you but the must earn yours"keep up the good work.

    Answer by cat260 at 9:45 AM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • It might be possible that your son is upset that you're never home and is acting up. Might be a good idea to pray for a higher paying job that will allow you to not work two jobs and get home earlier.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:03 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • I am wondering if maybe he would benefit from having a good adult male role model. Is his dad in the picture? If not you could sign him up for big brothers and sisters.

    Answer by Anonymous at 2:04 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • How about an uncle to mentor him. :ow about a ministry at church? Stay in his buisness! Spend time with him. My son tired pushing me away and I didn't let that stop me. - try to do devotions with hin nightly.

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:16 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • I am in the same situation as you except son lives with dad, dad woks till 7:00 each night. My son told me he has a job interview with Redner's market for a cashier position and would work a couple hours after school. I think time with parents now especially is most crucial. He seems more interested in friends right now though. Crying out more for more time to spend with dad. Uncle has stepped in and spends a couple hours a week with him. I am so hoping he gets the job. If so this is a goood outlet. My son is going to start the teen group every Sunday night.

    Answer by nan16 at 8:09 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

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