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My mom is dying, how do I prepare myself?

Ok, ladies. My mom is 55 years old. In the past year and a half, she has had problems with her heart, lungs and kidneys. In December she had several procedures done to her heart. She had some complications to deal with and went home. A month later, her chest got infected and she went down hill from there. We seriously thought she was going to die. Now she is home, after more than 6 months in hospitals and rehab facitilities. She has been home a little more than a month and her heart rate is up to 138 again. She is having trouble breathing and has gained a lot of weight from fluid build up. She is exhibiting signs of heart failure and does not care. My dad and I have tried telling her this but she will not hear of it. I know she can live for a long time, but I am afraid that one morning I am going to wake up and she will be dead. What can I do to prepare myself for this moment? Thanks.


Asked by krissyvelazquez at 8:13 PM on Aug. 23, 2009 in Relationships

Level 19 (8,028 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • When my dad heard he had a heart condition he prepared every night to not wake up in the morning. He prepared himself for death on his terms. I was not able to be there for him but when my mom found out she had cancer I was determined to be there for her. What I learned was to make each day count. Don't face each day dreading what "might be" (finding her dead). She needs your positive energy now so she can transcend to the next life (heaven, next life, whatever you believe). One of the greatest things for me was 2 nights before mom died she was sound asleep and sat up and called for her deceased mom and sister by name telling them "I need you". That was comforting to me knowing she'd be guided over by her loved ones. The next night we sat up laughing and joking and having a great time. She died while I was sleeping the next day so my sister had to face that moment. Do you have hospice? That might help you from finding her.

    Answer by admckenzie at 8:36 PM on Aug. 23, 2009

  • There is nothing you can ever do to prepare yourself for a day without your mom. Just enjoy her in the here and now. Talk,listen say and ask all the things you want and most of all tell her you love her.

    Answer by Grandmarga at 8:18 PM on Aug. 23, 2009

  • there are alot of books out there that could help you. other then that i honestly dont know what to tell u.....sorry

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:20 PM on Aug. 23, 2009


    This site helped me when my mom was dying.

    Answer by Grandmarga at 8:23 PM on Aug. 23, 2009