Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Wandering eyes!!!

Do you think its wrong for your mate to look at a person of the opposite sex while they are with you??? If so why??? Also do you think its wrong for you or your mate to find a person of the opposite sex attractive??? why or why not???My answer is #1 no I dont think its wrong to look as long as its not a stare... You can look and sometimes  may not be intentional... #2 I dont think its wrong for you or your mate to find another person attractive rather your married or in a committed relationship as long as you dont act upon it... I mean your not dead... So whats the harm...

Answer Question
 
JaYsMoMmY09

Asked by JaYsMoMmY09 at 9:11 PM on Aug. 23, 2009 in Relationships

Level 3 (15 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • I think as long as they are discreet, no, it's not a big deal. I glance at attractive men as they pass by. It's got nothing to do with my boyfriend not being attractive or enough for me. I find him incredibly sexy, and have everything I want, physically, emotionally and every other way, in him. But I can still appreciate a good looking man. And I expec that even though he loves me just as much, and finds me just as attractive and satisfying, that he also can appreciate a good looking woman. I don't want to see his tongue hanging out over her, and I prefer not to know for sure if he's looked, but I know he does, I just don't worry about it, because I know he is with me and that he will never go anywhere else.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 9:19 PM on Aug. 23, 2009

  • i disagree with you on both of those questions. but especially number one. i dont even really care to explain why though, i just do.
    PURPULbutterfly

    Answer by PURPULbutterfly at 9:19 PM on Aug. 23, 2009

  • okay NM im gonna say why. i just dont see the point. what is the point in looking at other people? i dont care what any of you say, you know it makes you uncomfortable to see your partner looking at someone else like how they look at you, and you know it makes them uncomfortable too. so why do it? you guys have eachother, you have sex with eachother, you love eachother. are you really that unsatisfyed with eachother that you HAVE to look at other people? cuz if you were satisfyed, you wouldnt be looking at other people. especially not right in front of them.
    PURPULbutterfly

    Answer by PURPULbutterfly at 9:21 PM on Aug. 23, 2009

  • If your man is looking at other women like he looks at you maybe you should take a look at your relationship b/c then he's lusting and he should not have lust for any other woman... And it has nothing to do with you being satisfied with your mate you are human and for you to say that we must not be satisfied thats crazy to me b/c your not being realistic....Secondly I am very confident in myself and I knw that he will look but im not looking at him to see if he's looking...I dont care if he looks he has eyes what can I do to no let me rephrase that what can any person do to stop another person from looking??? cut their eyes out LOL be real... You cant stop your man from looking...
    JaYsMoMmY09

    Answer by JaYsMoMmY09 at 9:36 PM on Aug. 23, 2009

  • Look but don't touch is our motto. But when it becomes a habitual thing for someone over and over , you know it has to stop. But 99% of the time it is harmless fun.
    bella69147

    Answer by bella69147 at 11:35 PM on Aug. 23, 2009

  • I think that all the crap we are fed about the way men are is what causes women to become so insecure in this area. We know, well many of us know that when you are satisfied with someone that is it. You are no longer playing the field so you aren't going to go scoping out other guys. If a guy does it, we explain it away as them being men. They just do it. Well, it is bull. Yes many men and women do that while they are committed to someone for their own reasons.
    I don't care what those reasons are. The point here is that if you are one of those people then fine. That is you and that is your relationship. You don't need to push that on to others though. Stop spreading lies that men are just that way and that if women do it then that must just because you are alive. Men do it though because they are pigs. All men aren't pigs. All men and women that are alive have attractions to many people. It doesn't mean sexual though.....
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:47 PM on Aug. 23, 2009

  • It is just people connecting because it is human nature to connect to others. Because we aren't dead we can be attracted to many different things about people. So we may observe many people that pass us by. To stare down someone though because they are hot is not only rude to the person you are staring at but it is gross if you have committed to someone else. Lusting after others is gross. We all have some form of lust in us when we are single and wanting to find someone to hook up with or commit to. After you committ to someone though it is disrespectful and I think that you should not have to only examin your relationship but examine the person you chose as a partner.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:50 PM on Aug. 23, 2009

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN