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How do you make a man understand?

Okay...so my husband feels he is supportive, does things for the kids and provides. I tell him that emotionally he does not give me what I need. Does anyone eles's husband feel like as long as they are supportive and loving that is it? How about following though with things they say they are going to do? What about porn addictions? What about being responsible for one's behavior? Why do men think as long as they are providing that is enough? I know I am rambling but does anyone feel me on this?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:40 PM on Aug. 24, 2009 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (5)
  • I was living with the same situation as you not to long ago... it landed us in counseling but ill tell you what I learned. We had to do this 'quiz' about the 5 love languages (its actually an entire book) well the 'providing for you' is actually a way some ppl show love. My DH felt like that where I needed the affection. Once he saw that his way of showing his love didn't spell love to me he changed his approach, and I also learned to show him love the way he feels love is. I suggest looking up that quiz and doing it w your DH it helped us a lot and is a great convo starter to explain what each of you NEED in your love. GL
    landensmommy411

    Answer by landensmommy411 at 4:00 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • He needs to put a little more focus on your relationship, tell him that if it hadn't been for your love there wouldn't be any kids and all that responsibilty, so he needs to work with you on falling in love again. Do you think he's cheating? And if he's more into porn than you then maybe you should strip down and just give it to him unexpectedly.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:43 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • A supportive husband would listen. It sound as if he is a good provider and a child himself. All I can suggest is that you are more specific with him. When you spent ___ hours looking at porno, it mekes me feel like ____________. When you don't take responsibilities for your own actions like (give example) it makes think that ___________. Ultimately, you can't make somebody do what they don't want to do. All you can do is communicate your concerns and feelings effectively and hope that he cares enough to do something positive about it. Also nobody is perfect so he won't satisfy all of your requirements of a "perfect husband" but let us hope that at least his behaviors aren't so bad that you decide to drop the towel. Good luck and try to see if been specific will make him see things from your perspective.
    bebita

    Answer by bebita at 3:45 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • men are stupid. Spell it out for him.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 3:46 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • Two books for you!!! One is called Personality Plus, and the other is The Five Love Languages. Awesome books!! Read em and maybe even encourage him to read them. It will even help with your children. Good Luck!!
    My3RaysofSun

    Answer by My3RaysofSun at 3:59 PM on Aug. 24, 2009