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Do you ever want to just give up? HELP!

I am a married 23 year old sahm. My husband is Military. We JUST pcsed to a dif location. My husband has had realllly varried hours. Some weeks 2pm-11pm.....then 6pm to 6am for a week at a time. My mom had my kids for a week n a half this summer. I just got them back a few days ago. All my 10 month old does is cry...(my mom held her constantly) and my sons school is being IGNORANT! I am having to drag my baby out in the sun for 4 miles a day, just to walk my son to a bus stop!!!!!! I have to "take care" of the kids by myself CONSTANTLY! Their dad is always at work (when they are up and awake) I have NO family or friends near by. I am NOT depressed! I am stressed the f*** out!!!!!!!!!!! The military hasnt given us our rise in BAH yet. So we are BROKE!!!!!!!!!!! I dont even know how we are going to make it to payday! Literally! I really jsut want to disapear. SERIOUSLY!!!!!!!!!! Oh the house is a disaster! HELPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 7:05 PM on Aug. 24, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • I understand except without the military or mom in the picture. It is me, myself and I 98% of the time with 2 kids under 2 yo and I would go completely nuts if it weren't for this site and the friends I've made here. I'm sorry you have to go through this but you are definitely NOT alone. Hang in there and chat with us here on CM when you want. =)
    firenicecream

    Answer by firenicecream at 7:08 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • Sometimes life just works out that the Mother raises the child most of the time. Your life isn't that bad. It could be way worse. Just be thanksful your kids are healthy and your Husband has a job.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:12 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • OP.........yeah it is pretty bad, when I have NO food in this house! No formula, No gas! DAMN, my legs look like a wooly fucking mamoth! I CANT EVEN SHAVE!!!!! Hell, my husband dont know how he is going to shave! He is out of razors!!!!!!!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:15 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • Can't you drive the car to the bus stop? If not, can't the family resources place help you out with matching you up with someone else who has to take their child to the bus stop? Four miles is a long way to go to a bus stop. As for the 10 month old crying, maybe he's not crying bc grandma held him, he might be reacting to your stressed energy. You are probably scaring him.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 7:16 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • It's one mile each way to the bus stop. Nobody will do anything because its "not that far". Even though there are NO sidewalks..........I cant use the car in the evenings, because my husband has it.....I will be able to drive him to school...................just dont know when. I LITERALLY cant afford to drive him to the bus stop!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:19 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • Do you have anything you can sell? Maybe try and have a yard sale this weekend or go to a local church's food bank. I am really sorry but don't think she was trying to judge when she said it could be worse. It really can be though. Try and look for some resources to help until you guys get things figured out with the Military. Sitting around waiting will not help. You have to be PRO ACTIVE and things will not just drop in your lap you have to find ways to deal with cards you have been dealt, you can't just push them aside and hope things will work themselves out. Get the phone book or look up things on line in your area.

    mommymine3

    Answer by mommymine3 at 7:22 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • OK. I want you to stop for a second and breathe and look at what you DO have.

    Kids? Check.

    Husband? Check. (Remember that it could be worse..he could be deployed. Or dead...that's a very real possibility for anyone in the military.)

    What kind of family assistance is there where you are? You need to talk to someone NOW about food assistance. Perhaps WIC. And transportation assistance.

    One mile each way to the bus stop? In what state is that considered acceptable? What happens when you call the school about it?
    gdiamante

    Answer by gdiamante at 7:25 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • If you have no money at all your husband can go to his commander and get "coupons" for the commissary... so you can at least buy some food!

    My husband is also in the Military so I understand the way you feel... They are gone alot, you have to move every 2 to 3 years...
    Just try to find websites where you can connect with other mom's in your area, maybe you find a group here on cafemom from your military station! If you live on post - a lot of posts offer playgroups!

    Don't sit there and feel bad about yourself! Grab your kids and go to a playground, or just a walk through the neighborhood!
    crazypink

    Answer by crazypink at 7:33 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • If you need somebody to talk about it you can write me a message! I'm also an army wife and I know what you going through!
    crazypink

    Answer by crazypink at 7:45 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

  • Just calm down, many of us as mothers have been in your shoes, we all have up and downs in our lives, I know perfectly how you feel, but I have realized that taking that attitude doesn´t do any better, for me, well.... I pray, then put some music that I like, clean my house or if I really don´t want to, I just grab my children and go out, then I return feeling better.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:12 PM on Aug. 24, 2009

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