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How many of you have VERY particular boys? Everything has to be just their way!

I knew girls were like this because I had 2 and I SO looked forward to having a boy. Sure enough, he was sweet, loving, let me dress him in whatever I wanted, compassionate, but still loves boy stuff. So when baby no 4 came along, I was anxious for ANOTHER boy thinking he would be the same way. I was SO wrong. This one is hell on wheels. Ive let him take his time in maturing because hes the youngest but in the last two weeks, he has potty trained himself completely, began taunting the other kids (just like they do him), explaining to me how he wants things done, and the most heart breaking.....telling me what he is and isnt going to wear! NO way. I let my oldest dd get away with it and now my 3 1/2 yr old SON is telling me he doesnt like shirts with no sleeves, shoes with no lights, underwear without Hulk on it...and on and on. Everythings a fight. Im going to win no matter what, but how many of you have boys like this?

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momofsaee

Asked by momofsaee at 1:29 PM on Aug. 25, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 4 (56 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • I know exactly what you are going through. My middle son is just like that. We call him our independant little snot (in a joking manner). He will fight everything unless it's his way. Heaven forbid if I give him X-men underwear instead of transformers or spiderman. I have 3 boys and they all have totally diffrent personalities.
    Juggalette0327

    Answer by Juggalette0327 at 1:37 PM on Aug. 25, 2009

  • My son is 7 and has been like that for as long as I can remember. I've learned to choose my battles, and clothes just doesn't fit in the ones I demand to win! Hehe. He's like that with how he dresses, what he eats, what he drinks, how his hair is....you name it, he wants it a particular way. Just pick your battles....
    KennsWifey

    Answer by KennsWifey at 2:08 PM on Aug. 25, 2009

  • oh no.. my son at 21 months is SO particular already.. I had no idea I was in for that ! he tells us who should be pushing him in the stroller, which route we are taking to the park "this way" what we all play on when we are there, what shoes/sandals we all can wear.He made daddy drink his milk with him the other night. i HAVE to drink my pop when he tells me..lol!! and this all with not a full vocabulary yet.. oh no!!!!!!!
    maxsmom11807

    Answer by maxsmom11807 at 2:09 PM on Aug. 25, 2009

  • Yep. My oldest is ASD and also has some sensory issues- so for him he has to have things just so, and follow his routine--- if things are 'off' then it throws him for a loop and sometimes leads to meltdowns... he does not like certain clothes- when he was little if I put him in jeans he would have meltdowns- he could not stand the feel of the denim and hated zippers. My youngest has sensory issues also so he is very picky about the clothes he wants to wear, and takes him a while to transition from 1 season clothes to the next. There is some suspicion that he might be on the ASD spectrum too...
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 2:26 PM on Aug. 25, 2009

  • Find the good. Don't stifle who he is or will grow up to be as an adult. He's a strong independent boy who will use those characteristics in life and go far. My grandmother wanted to control me and keep me "in line" and made me stop arguing all the time. Turns out, that characteristic would have been an asset for me in the field of law. By the time I figured it all out I felt too old to go to law school even though I was accepted later in life. Pick your battles. So what if he wants to wear a certain thing? It won't matter in the scheme of life.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:43 PM on Aug. 25, 2009

  • Thank you for your responses. Ive had enough parenting experience to know when to pick my battles. Its not about the clothes, its about the attitude. I wont allow him to demand anything out of me. He may express that he is unhappy with his shirt, but he may not scream and cry over it. He may not tell me what to do and he must learn to control his outbursts and his wanting it NOW. There are times when I need him to wear a certain thing or certain type of clothing (ie, pants because its cold) and hes wanting a bathing suit. I spent a LOT of time fighting with my girls over clothes because I simply wasnt prepared for their "opinion" so early, so I thought I was done with that because it was now the boys that were little. I guess not. His little personality is perfect and fine with me, but as a parent, its my job to teach him character, self control, integrity, patience and respect for his siblings. Hes just giving me a hard time
    momofsaee

    Answer by momofsaee at 3:13 PM on Aug. 25, 2009

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