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Why is he so bad?

My 5 year old step son has a big problem with hitting an cussing he was kicked out of his summer camp because of this! So me an my hubby have him for the rest of his summer! Well hes only been here for one day an has already started beatin up on my almost 5 year old an my 3 year old sons! Step son is also tryin to get my 2 boys to cuss an my 2 know better but they see step son doing it so they think its ok for them! Step sons mom has taken him to doc an they said it could be adhd but i didnt think childern with adhd were really voilent! Im scared because im 35 wks prego an im so afaird that he is going to try to beat on the baby! Anyone have any ideas on how i can get him to stop hi violent behavior!

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mommyof2boysmd

Asked by mommyof2boysmd at 2:46 PM on Aug. 25, 2009 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 6 (124 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • You can't blame the cussing on ADHD, that is something he has learned and picked up from someone that he is around often. Children with ADHD can be violent however I think you have a case of where a child just wasn't corrected and punished when he was younger and now the mom is wondering why she can't all of a sudden correct him. It's something that should have been done when he was younger. Wish I could offer more advice but all I can suggest is get him into therapy and maybe that will help. I definately would not be putting up with him beating on my other kids or teaching them curse. Everytime he curses put some soap in his mouth.
    KalebsMommee

    Answer by KalebsMommee at 2:54 PM on Aug. 25, 2009

  • It sounds like he might be mad about something. Have you guys ever asked him what makes him feel angry? And why does he feel the need to hit? It wouldn't hurt.....and soap, good idea. My mom used hot sauce.
    pinky63

    Answer by pinky63 at 9:54 PM on Aug. 25, 2009

  • Children with ADHD are NOT violent and nor do they cuss all the time. You need to have him tested for other disorders. Seeing he is with you, have his father set up an appointment with a child counselor. DO NOT put soap in his mouth, soap can make a person very sick. I don't think this is all about his mom not disciplinig him, there could be more going on than that. He could be ODD (Oppositional Defiant Disorder) or have another behavioral disorder. Instead of the soap, everytime he cusses have him write out dictionary pages or Bible passages. The punishment will then help him learn something else.
    tyfry7496

    Answer by tyfry7496 at 10:21 PM on Aug. 25, 2009

  • My son has ADHD and he is not violent. ADHD does not cause kids to be aggressive. It is the way kids are brought up (for the most part) on the behavior. I would start punishing him and taking away privileges. if he acts up take some away I would also suggest the book 1-2-3 magic....sounds like he needs it bad be consistent with him and always follow thru with him. Never threaten a punishment that you are not going to follow thru on. I would not put soap in his mouth the mother may use it against you

    justgrape723

    Answer by justgrape723 at 10:58 PM on Aug. 25, 2009

  • I want to give you some advice....Take your son to your pediatrician and seek for a referral to a behavioral institute or nurse practitioner who has the exerience dealing with behavioral issues. Your step-son's issues need to be addressed before the newest addition arrives, and things will continue to get worse if they don't. If you have tried discipline to no avail, then I would definitely say this is the next step you should take. I will mention that violence is not criteria for diagnosing ADHD in children, but I will say this, ADHD makes a child EXTREMELY impulsive, and unable to understand the consequences of their behaviors to some degree. It's worth looking into!
    Heathercurlz

    Answer by Heathercurlz at 7:23 PM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • Oh....and I forgot to mention....My 5 yr. old son was just recently diagnosed with ADHD! Just to let you know I'm speaking from experience!
    Heathercurlz

    Answer by Heathercurlz at 7:23 PM on Aug. 26, 2009

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