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F U???

so my hubby claims he respects me, but how can he respect me... when we fight yes i say FU cause im furious.. therefor i dont respect him he claims, but then he slams me into the wall smacks me on my side, pins me to the wall by my neck to yell at me.. and ironically to yell at me about respect... and that i say FU its not respect(which i know it isnt heat of a fight its said) but how can you talk to me about respect when you do this to me..... i want to leave but last time i tried he took my dd with him and was gone for 12 hrs w/o a call nothing with her.. i just find it funny smacking me and saying i dont respect him.. is hurting me respecting me?

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Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:35 AM on Aug. 26, 2009 in Relationships

Answers (12)
  • No he doesn't respect you and he took the child to control you and keep you under his thumb. Make a plan and when he's not on guard watching you, leave. This won't get better. It will only escalate.
    admckenzie

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:41 AM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • Okay forget about the words, what you are describing is a physically and verbally abusive relationship. A very toxic one by the way and what is more aggravating is that there is a child involved and witnessing all this madness. Get a clue and leave that man before he hurts you or your child even more. There are shelters, churches, anybody will help a woman escaping an abusive relationship. I don't get it, this man is scaring your child for life and you are concerned about who is right? Hello, wake up honey, this is a very toxic environment for your child.
    bebita

    Answer by bebita at 10:47 AM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • Get Out. I was in a abusive relationship and got out. Life is to short to be in a situation like that.
    dillonsma

    Answer by dillonsma at 10:54 AM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • He's right, you don't respect him. And why the hell should you, when he doesn't respect you and he treats you like that? You need to figure out a way to get away from him. I don't know your situation, so it's hard to make suggestions, but I'd look for a friend or family member you can stay with, a battered women's shelter, or something to get out. And then, one day, when he's at work, or out with friends or whatever, take your daughter and go.
    tropicalmama

    Answer by tropicalmama at 11:04 AM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • get out!
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:08 AM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • if it happens again, call the police file a report and tell them you want a restraining order for you and your dd, because youre afraid its gonna get worse and youre worried about him being around your dd. youll end up having to go to court and all that, but with the proof from the police you can lose. then leave go as far as you can.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:10 AM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • While he is at work. Pack a bag. And leave with your DD. Simple as that. he is just trying to control you by scaring you.

    louise2

    Answer by louise2 at 11:14 AM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • GO TO A SHELTER FOR ABUSED WOMEN!!!!!!!!
    emnasmom

    Answer by emnasmom at 11:28 AM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • Go to the courthouse and get a protection order against him and the police will escort you to your home to get your things and your daughter, or alternative will make him leave. see an attorney asap, or call the local batter women's shelter, they will help you. you need to get out of this before he starts hurting your child too.......
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:36 PM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • I understand the not wanting to leave because your daughter loves her daddy....her is the thing

    DO YOU WANT HER TO GROW UP THINKING AND BELIEVING THAT THE WAY HER DADDY TREATS YOU IS NORMAL AND THEREFORE SINCE SHE THINKS IT IS NORMAL WILL END UP WITH HER VERY OWN ABUSIVE MAN????

    Just curious, think about that and your daughter...it really is about what is best for her. I had 3 girls in my first marriage and left because I needed to teach my girls you leave when a man is abusive....Too never put up with abuse, no matter what!

    They are 16,18 and 22 and they "GET IT" now and don't hold it against me for protecting them.
    wheresthewayout

    Answer by wheresthewayout at 12:42 PM on Aug. 26, 2009

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