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my parents...

my parents have watched my son 3times and he is going on 8 months old.they see him alot but really annoy me when they call him their baby.they dont try to give advice but they tell me how he should be raised.what he should eat when he should sleep.what he should wear.they say to stop feeding him formula and just give him jar of food. but i know thats not right .so now my moms mad.he is a very happy baby but when they watch him he comes back crying and sickno more watching him.now she is freaking out and saying she wants full custody.they are sorta my adopted parents my husband use to work for them and we kind grew close and did holidays and what not.there is no real relation.i have heard of her talk about wanting to have a baby boy cause she has no kids.and just recently she wantes to take my son for 2weeks to a family wedding outta state.im afraid they will take him and not come back.were not invited.this doesnt sound right..

Answer Question
 
b4byd0ll

Asked by b4byd0ll at 12:09 PM on Aug. 26, 2009 in General Parenting

Level 3 (23 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • 1) They're not your parents, they're "sorta my adopted parents".
    2) They want to take someone else's infant out of state.

    I think it's beyond time to cut ties to these people.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:12 PM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • Ditto to the answer above
    jenree33

    Answer by jenree33 at 12:16 PM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • I agree. Ditto. Its a bit creepy and since there's no real relation so there is no chance they can get any custody of him. Cut off ties now before they get worse.
    MommyLee08

    Answer by MommyLee08 at 12:19 PM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • When it comes to your children, you can say no just because it "doesn't sound right". Parents know. You have no reason to trust them and if you can't trust them to feed your child well for a couple of hours and provide good care, then how do you expect them to care for him for 2 solid weeks.
    Mom1Stepmom1

    Answer by Mom1Stepmom1 at 12:19 PM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • Creepy!!!! I'd tell them you aren't really comfortable being around them anymore...and if that doesnt work I'd get a restraining order....no one...not even my own biological mother would be allowed to take my 8 month old out of state without me that doesnt even sound right.
    newmama008

    Answer by newmama008 at 12:22 PM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • I have a great relationship with my mother and even with my in laws BUT no way they would have ever taken one of my babies on a trip!!! The fact they disregard your rules just when they babysit is enough to put an end to this relationship. This is not healthy for you or your baby! They cannot be trusted!
    jessa1091

    Answer by jessa1091 at 12:55 PM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • Sounds like they are very controlling and have fixated on your child. Since they are not any relation to you, I would let them know there is 'no way in Hell' that the child will be going with them to a wedding and be gone 2 wks(especially since you are not invited)! That really sounds fishy to me... and I think to you too. Trust your instincts. I think it would be in you and your childs best interest to cut all ties with them. Good luck!
    MizLee

    Answer by MizLee at 12:56 PM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • if you want to keep them in your lives that;s up to you. However, if they are disregarding your authority and telling you what to do with your child then you need to put your foot down. These people have NO blood relation to you, how DARE they tell you how to raise your child. You need to make it very clear that you will be the one to make the decisions about his life and not them. If they don't like it, they can kick rocks. You don't need people like that trying to run your or your child's life.
    And there's NOTHING they can do about custody.. they'd have to prove your a bad parent and even then the child would go to someone related to you. Trust your instincts on this one.. do what you think is best but personally I would stop letting them have him unsupervised and certainly don't let him out of state with them!
    kristal2146

    Answer by kristal2146 at 1:45 PM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • Ok how come at first you say they are your parents but then you turn around and say well they're really.. kinda sorta not my parents they are someone your husband works with? That's nowhere near being your parents. Putting up with what you are from your parents are one thing (Even then it's too much ) but from someone who isn't even related or isn't even your actual adopted parents is crossing the line. Cut your ties with these people. Seriously.
    KalebsMommee

    Answer by KalebsMommee at 2:13 PM on Aug. 26, 2009

  • One of the great joys of having strong boundaries is that freakish behaviour like this never gets a look in.

    My kids did not have babysitters of any kind until they could speak. Once they could speak, they rarely stayed with people they'd known their whole lives, whose parenting I knew enough about to respect (no 16yos, no childless aunts). When they were much older, they were allowed to stay at friends' houses (when I knew the parents well), my parents' and a young couple they'd known for about 10 years.

    My simple rule was 'kids need their moms' and I never needed to do anything that I couldn't take my kids to or put off until dad was home. Dh was in the navy and was often gone for 6 months at a time. If people 'needed' to visit with my kids, they got me, too --until they were much older than 6.

    I'm confused about your definition of 'advice' --telling you what a child should eat sounds like advice to me.
    LindaClement

    Answer by LindaClement at 6:15 PM on Aug. 26, 2009

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